Footage Found On The Cutting Room Floor
by JessAlmasy
Summary: One-shot sequels and deleted scenes from my stories. Pairings and ratings depend on the story/chapter- Kurtbastian or Puckurt.
1. Skype With Caution: Reactions

**Okay, so I've been toying with the idea of story sequels or 'deleted scenes' for awhile, and I finally decided to start them. This story will always be 'complete' because I don't know how many I'll write but I don't want to make a bunch of new stories just for one-shots. So my husband came up with the title and I won't post anything unless it's all I plan to do with that idea. Not to say I won't add more later about the same story, but it will be a different time/subject. (Like with Princess Peach, I want to write one about Kurt meeting Grand-mère and one about their daughter. That would be 2 separate chapters.)**

 **Also, I screwed up their ages in Skype. Since Kurt was 16 in season 1, he'd be 18 by now, not 17. So Seb is 17 and Kurt is 18. In case you're keeping track of the ages from Skype With Caution.**

* * *

Skype With Caution: Reactions

[Kurt]

As he parks outside his house, staring at his front door, Kurt tries to think up any excuse he can to get out of his current situation. _I doubt Dad's seen it yet... he's probably at work and he doesn't have Facebook... But Carol definitely has, and she'll show him. So that's coming._

The immediate problem is Finn. And Sam. And possibly Puck. _Although at least Puck knows about Friday and Saturday, so he shouldn't be too surprised... hopefully._

Sighing heavily, Kurt grabs his bag off the passenger seat and gets out of the nav. Walking up the drive he tries to prepare himself for what's coming. As soon as he opens the door, he's met by three expectant stares. Groaning, Kurt shuts the door and drops his bag by the chair before flopping into it.

"Go ahead."

Puck opens his mouth but Finn glares at him and speaks up first. "What the hell is going on?!"

Kurt crosses his arms and does his best to stare Finn down. "I don't know what you mean. You'll have to be more specific."

Finn glares and points at Kurt. "You know exactly what I mean! How could you cheat on Blaine like this!?"

Huffing, Kurt turns to Puck. "You couldn't have at least cleared **that** up?"

Puck leans back with a smirk. "Hey! You said I couldn't tell anyone anything. So I didn't. This isn't my fault, princess."

Switching his glare from the tanned boy to Finn, he bites out, "I'm not dating Blaine, dammit! I've **told** you guys that. Repeatedly. We're friends! Granted, we were pretending to date part of the time to protect his virtue but that turned out to be a **very** stupid idea."

Finn scoffs. "I think you should have been a bit more worried about your own virtue, from the looks of it."

Narrowing his eyes dangerously, Kurt says, "You wanna run that by me again, Mr. I Slept With A Lesbian For the Lulz **Two Years Ago**?"

Trying to pull focus, Sam jumps in, "We're just worried, Kurt! We've never heard about this guy. All we knew was you seemed to be dating Blaine but would never admit it, then the next thing we know you're in bed with some asshole Warbler!"

Kurt wants to be offended on Sebastian's behalf... but he's right. Seb **is** kind of an asshole. Instead he just points to Puck. "He knew about this. He's the only person that noticed how upset I've been lately and **asked me about it**. Finn, you tried to make me muffins -which by the way, your heart was in the right place, but never again- but you never actually asked me what was wrong. No one else noticed anything at all."

With the new knowledge that Puck had known both boys turn to look at him with betrayed looks on their faces. Throwing his hands up, he yells out, "Hey, no! You don't get to get mad at me! All you had to do was ask him. But it wasn't my secret to tell and I didn't think he'd actually go see the asshole. But I was actually glad to see the post. I was right, Kurt's hot!"

Giggling, Kurt stands from the chair and grabs his bag. "Well, embargo lifted. Feel free to tell them the whole story. Just know that we **are** dating now, so you'll all have to put on your big boy pants and get along with him. He's picking me up on Friday for a date."

As Kurt turns to go up the stairs, he takes off his blazer and slings it over his arm. That seems to be the first time they all look at his clothes. _They're so used to blocking out my wardrobe that they don't notice when it's different..._

Sam yelps out, "Hey! What the hell's with the Dalton uniform?!"

Finn points angrily, "Why is your shirt so big?!"

Puck laughs uproariously, "Oh my god! You totally fucked in the dorms didn't you?! I wondered how he got the picture!"

Kurt darts up the stairs without answering any of them and slams the door. As he's wedging a chair under it he thinks to himself, _I really need to invest in a chain. Or a padlock._

* * *

That night, after Kurt had chased Puck home and had placated Sam and Finn enough to be left alone, Kurt finally gave in and got his webcam out. He'd set his laptop up and left it sitting a few feet away while he worked on some of the schoolwork Finn had brought him.

He was working on the last assignment, with Sebastian mostly ignoring him -except for the random smiles aimed at him every few minutes- when his dad had knocked on his door and stepped inside. He'd left the door cracked for him, knowing that it was a talk he wouldn't be able to avoid.

When Burt steps into the room with a carefully blank face, Kurt sighs. Without waiting for him to say anything, Kurt turns the laptop to where Sebastian and Burt can see each other.

"Dad, this is Sebastian. We've been friends for almost nine months, online. When we met he lived in Paris. Now, he goes to Dalton. He **still** doesn't know where I live. I met him by accident, through Blaine. He only learned my real name and face after I'd met him. He can hear and see us right now. If you want, I can sign off so we can talk, I just thought you might want to see how I got to know him. I could see that he was a young guy, not a creeper or a pedophile. We got to know each other really well over the summer. I've even talked to his sister quite a bit."

When Kurt finally stops babbling, Sebastian is quietly laughing at him and Burt is staring at him, speechless. Eventually, Sebastian gets a hold of himself and clears his throat. "Nice to meet you, sir. I'm sorry you had to find out about us like this."

When all Burt does is stare at the laptop in confusion, Kurt giggles. "It was weird for us too, Dad. Neither of us had ever made an online friend like this before. It was definitely a bumpy ride."

Burt finally pulls himself together enough to say, "I **would** like to speak to you alone, Kurt. But first, when will I get to meet him for real? It was... interesting, to get to meet him like this, but I'd like to actually have a conversation with him."

Kurt smiles, "We have a date on Friday, if I'm not grounded. You can meet him then. I'm sure Finn and the guys will want to meet him too and I could use your help getting them to leave after a couple of minutes. Just play the Dad Card and kick them out."

Laughing, Burt agrees. "Fine. Sounds good. You can go out on Friday but you're grounded the rest of the weekend."

Knowing that Burt was only agreeing because he wanted to meet Sebastian, Kurt just shrugs. He wouldn't want to do anything else that weekend besides talk to Seb anyway.

Turning the laptop back toward him, Kurt smiles at Sebastian. "Okay, hun. Gotta go. I'll text you in the morning and see you on here after school."

Winking at him, Sebastian replies, "Sure, babe. See you tomorrow. Love you."

Blushing and glancing up at his dad who now has his eyebrows lifted almost under his hat, Kurt says, "Love you too, sweetie. Bye!"

With a wave, Sebastian ends the call and Kurt shuts the laptop. Setting it aside, Kurt scoots back against the headboard and gathers up his papers and stuff so Burt can sit if he wants to.

As soon as Burt sits, he turns to Kurt. "Okay, so you kept calling him your friend, but then you said you have a date, and you love him. Not to mention the picture we're not talking about... What's going on?"

Blushing again, Kurt mutters, "Damn you, Jeff." Sighing, he says, "Okay, so like I said, we've known each other for almost nine months online. During that time, we were just friends. We weren't like online dating or anything. We didn't talk about things that were super personal. I didn't even tell him my real name. But... I fell in love with him. He's gay, obviously, and he's been out for a long time. He's really confident, and smart, and he's kind of a jerk, but not as much of one as he pretends to be. He spoils his little sister, and he's a good son. He's taking a bunch of honors and AP classes so he can get to law school as soon as he can. His dad is a lawyer, and he wants to be one too-"

"He's god's gift to teenage gay boys, I get it, Kurt." Burt sounds amused, not annoyed so Kurt laughs.

"No, actually, he's a bit like Noah. **He** thinks he's god's gift, but really he's just afraid of getting hurt. And I did hurt him, accidentally. He liked me and I lied to him. It's a long story, and I'm actually considering making up a flyer to hand out or making a video or something so I won't have to repeat it so often, but basically I lied and confused him and hurt him. The um... picture, was taken shortly after I went to explain it all and we uh... made up."

Shifting uncomfortably, Burt asks, "So now you're...?"

"Dating. We um, were going to try the online dating thing, because I hadn't told him I lived here. He thought I lived in Kentucky. I didn't want to meet him because I didn't think he could like me... I was wrong about that. Obviously. Anyway, that's why I was so upset this past weekend. I thought he'd never forgive me and that I'd lost not only a really good friend, but the chance to be with him. So today, I decided I'd go and apologize. After we cleared up the misunderstandings and told each other how we feel... we uh... decided to start dating for real."

Nodding slowly but looking steadily more uncomfortable about where this was heading, Burt asks, "So... you guys are going out. And you care about each other a lot, love each other. Today... okay. I don't want to talk about this either, just tell me if you guys were safe and I'll drop it."

Blushing and laughing nervously, Kurt says, "Yes, Dad. We were safe. And I'm fine. We were... careful." When Burt nods shakily but doesn't respond negatively, Kurt decides to push it a bit. "Um, probably not right away, because we're just now dating, but sometime soon, it'd be nice if he could stay the night here. I'm over 18 and he'll be 18 in like five months, and since I'm leaving for college this summer, I'd like to spend some time with him before I go."

Burt sighs heavily and thinks to himself for a minute. Eventually conceding that it was a little late to worry about it now, he says, "Fine, but I want at least 24 hours notice. And if you guys are sleeping in here, the door stays open."

Giggling at his concern, Kurt agrees. "Sure, Dad." _Like we can't just shut the door after you fall asleep?_

As Burt gets up and heads toward the door he turns to look at Kurt one more time. "If he does something to hurt you, I won't hesitate to shoot him. I'm a congressman now. I'm sure I can find some guys to help me hide a body."

Gulping, Kurt smiles shakily. "Noted."

* * *

The next day, Kurt tries everything he can think of to convince Burt to let him stay home from school. Nothing works. He should have known that once his father put together that he'd allowed his son to stay home from school and that had resulted in him losing his virginity, he'd never be trusted again.

Now he was ducking from car to car in the parking lot, trying to reach the side door off the gym, the last place anyone would think to look for him. He'd had Burt drop him off so the glee club couldn't mob his truck, figuring that he could just get a ride with one of the guys. He knows that Finn, Sam, and Puck will have spread his story as much as they could over the weekend, but if Kurt can just manage to hide himself until classes start, he should be able to dodge them until after school. Hopefully by then, they'll all just need confirmation.

Kurt had turned off his phone as soon as he'd shot off a text to Jeff. Thinking about it now, he might have been overreacting a bit to text him, _**You're dead to me. And soon to everyone else, too.**_

Since football season was over, Kurt ducks into the locker room, locking the door behind him and sitting on the bench. Deciding to bite the bullet since he has nothing better to do, Kurt turns his phone back on. As soon as his phone loads up, he's hit with a massive amount of missed calls, texts, and a full voicemail box. Quickly deciding that he can't be bothered with any of it, he pulls up a text to Sebastian.

 _ **To Bas: Hey, hun. I'm at school now. I've managed to dodge the slobbering horde, for now. Soon enough I'm sure I'll be accosted and asked for details. Anything you'd like kept private? So far the only one that knows details is my dad and he'll do everything in his power to forget them.**_

 _From Bas: LOL ur poor dad. Na, babe. Idc what u tell ppl, as long as they know ur taken =P_

 _ **To Bas: lol Don't worry, I've already informed Noah, which was your main concern. No one else will care and he was just happy for us.**_

 _From Bas: Lets hope every1 else feels that way. Ok, gotta get to class. See u after school, babe._

After that, Kurt is left bored and annoyed. Kurt deletes all the missed calls and messages and sends out a mass text to everyone in his 'recent' contacts.

 _ **To All: Since I was flooded with so many messages, I've deleted everything. Anyone with an *important* message should text me again. Anyone asking questions about my love life with be blocked for 24 hours. Test me on this, please. I need less people in my life.**_

The only person that doesn't heed the warning is Rachel, who gets blocked quickly. The only other text he gets is from Blaine.

 _From Blaine: So... am I allowed to ask if Sebastian is 'Bas' or will that get me blocked? D=_

Giggling, Kurt concedes that Blaine probably does deserve some kind of explanation, all things considered. After a quick text telling him to meet him in the locker room, but to tell no one, Kurt resigns himself to a very long day filled with way too much talking. Even for him.

* * *

When glee club finally ends, Kurt groans as everyone turns to him as one. He'd only gotten out a hasty "We met online last year. Yes, we're dating. No, you can't meet him yet. Leave us alone!" before Mr. Schue had shown up and started class. Now that class was over, it was time for round two. Deciding that the best way to avoid all of this was to just make a break for it, Kurt grabs his bag and runs, full tilt, for the door.

It's only as he bursts out the front door and heads for the parking lot that he remembers... he didn't drive today. Sighing, he turns to face the slowly closing door and the group of 'friends' charging down the hallway at him. _So much for that plan. All of my avoidance, all day, wasted._

They'd all more or less heard the story by now but everyone wanted to meet him and were being really stubborn about letting it go. Even Puck had insisted that they should get to check him out and make sure he was good enough for Kurt.

Crossing his arms and glaring at the group coming out the double doors, Kurt shrieks and almost bursts everyone's eardrums as an arm snakes around his waist from behind.

Turning to look over his shoulder with wide eyes, he's met by the wincing face of his boyfriend.

As Sebastian rubs at his ear, he announces loudly, "Damn, babe. I knew you were a screamer but Jesus Christ, never do that again."

Gaping at him, Kurt squeaks out, "What are you doing here?" and turns in his arms to face him.

Seb smirks at him and pulls him closer, leaning back on the railing behind him. "All day long I was getting inane questions and comments from the idiots that thought you were dating 'Blainers' so I cut after lunch. I hung out in my room for awhile before I realized you were probably catching a lot of the same shit that I was. Figured I'd come bail you out."

Letting out a deep breath, Kurt leans in and presses his forehead to Sebastian's neck. "You're a lifesaver. Please tell me you have your car."

Arching an eyebrow at him, Seb says, "Nope. I took the underground railroad. How the fuck else would I get here, babe?"

Pinching him, Kurt maintains, "You might have gotten a ride or something. I don't know, but I left my nav at home so you can drive me back."

Snorting Sebastian nods over Kurt's shoulder. "I'm pretty sure if we attempt to leave before I can be interrogated, they'll just follow us."

Puck smirks. "Hey! He's smarter than he looks!"

Grinning at Puck widely, Sebastian moves his hand down to Kurt's ass and says, "You must be the infamous 'Noah'! And here Kurt told me you were our best supporter!"

Laughing, Puck steps forward to shake Seb's hand, purposely using the one that would force Sebastian to release his ass. Smirking, he replies, "Yep! If he's happy, I'm happy. As long as you don't hurt him, we're good. But the days of him crying on my shoulder over you better be fucking **over**."

Frowning down at the blushing Kurt, Sebastian releases Puck's hand, not even caring that it's a little sore from the tight grip. "Wait, what? Why does he make it sound like it's a thing. This weekend was horrible, but that was it, right?"

Kurt looks from Puck to Sebastian uncomfortably. When neither seems likely to say anything else with a response, Kurt mumbles, "It um... may have happened before then..."

Puck snorts. "If you won't tell him, I will." Turning back to the taller boy, he elaborates, "The first time he cried over you, to my knowledge, was around when school started. And after Halloween, he was a basket case. What the hell did you think I meant when I talked to you last week?"

Floored, Sebastian pulls Kurt closer, looking up at Puck. "You said he was sad and mopey, not crying! And it wasn't even the first time? Jesus. People that date online are **crazy**."

Kurt chuckles, hiding his flushed face in Sebastian's chest. " **We** dated online... briefly."

"Exactly! Who knows better than people who have actually done it. We're all insane."

Puck shakes his head and steps back into the crowd beside everyone else. Sebastian had seemed genuinely shocked and worried that he'd made Kurt cry, and that was good enough for Puck. Finn wasn't as easily appeased.

"Wait! Why was Kurt crying? What did the Warbler do?"

Kurt glares at him. "The Warbler's name is Sebastian, and he didn't really **do** anything. I was just upset because I thought we were just friends and he wouldn't like me enough to date me."

Seb smirks down at him. "You could have just said 'I was being stupid' because if it was up to me, we'd have been dating months ago."

Kurt smacks him. "I didn't know that! Shut up."

Everyone seems mostly satisfied, if still curious. The obvious exception is Blaine who had been eying Sebastian the whole time like he was a bug that Blaine couldn't figure out. Eventually Kurt gets tired of the speculation and says,

"Just ask, Blaine."

Jumping slightly at being called out, Blaine clears his throat. "I was just wondering why he was hitting on me if he's liked you for months. Seems... disloyal."

It's Kurt's turn to smirk up at Seb as he shifts uncomfortably.

"Well... we weren't dating so I wasn't like... **cheating** on him. When I first met you, I was pissed at him, but I didn't know who he was. I thought he was with that guy." He nods at Puck. "After we made up, I was just fucking with him. Not Eli, the guy from the internet, but Hummel, Blaine's boyfriend. He did nothing but glare at me and try to set me on fire with his thoughts, so I was trying to piss him off by hanging all over his boyfriend."

Kurt laughs. "He had no idea that what I hated was that Sebastian didn't like **me**. And that he was hitting on someone else even after he had an 'online boyfriend'."

Raising his hands in surrender, Sebastian repeats, "Hey! I was just fucking with you! If Blaine had started flirting back or agreed to mess around, I'd have turned him down."

Finally having enough of the 3rd degree that he'd fought tooth and nail to avoid, Kurt turns to his friends. "Okay! Bas probably won't be here long, so I'm going with him. You got to meet him, don't text me, don't follow us. Leave us alone!"

Pulling Seb away by the hand, Kurt turns to him. "Where's your car? We need to hurry before they decide you might be up to nefarious plots or something."

Laughing, Seb pulls his keys out of his pocket and uses the fob to unlock the car and turn off the alarm. At the chirp, Kurt turns to him with wide eyes. "A Porsche? You drive a fucking Porsche?!"

Sebastian grins at him before pushing Kurt against the passenger side door and leaning in to kiss him. Just before their lips meet, the taller boy mutters, "Play your cards right and I might even let you drive it, babe."

Biting Sebastian's lower lip gently, Kurt mumbles back, "Later on, when I'm blowing you in it, remember that I loved you before I found out about the Porsche, so it's not **just** the car. It's just an awesome bonus."

Hit by the mental image of Kurt on his knees in the floorboard of the tiny car, Sebastian sucks in a quick breath. "Get in the car. We need out of public eyes, now."

Grinning, Kurt slides into the passenger seat and waits for Sebastian to walk around. After he closes the door, Kurt smirks at him.

"Actually, I'm pretty sure the guys are going over to Puck's... so if you wanted to see what my room looks like-" He's interrupted by lips pressed against his own.

* * *

 **Thanks for reading! ^_^**


	2. Dude Looks Like A Lady: Puck's Feels

**After I decided to do sequels, I told my husband to pick any of my stories and any idea he wanted to see in that universe. He popped out with 'Puck's POV during the kissing booth scene'. idek.**

 **On a similar note, if anyone has anything (either a sequel or deleted scene) they'd really like to see about any of my stories, now or in the future, I'm always willing to listen! Most of my stuff is at least partly bc my husband was like 'oh hey! do this!' lol**

* * *

Dude Looks Like A Lady: Puck's Feels

[Puck]

When the kid with the hair gel had showed up at McKinley to sing to Lizzie, Puck had immediately hated him. It wasn't the fact that he was the ex of the girl Puck had his eye on or that he was obviously an attention whore. No, his reason was dumber.

He was preppy. And probably rich. A goodie, goodie. A boarding school nerd.

He was a 'nice guy'.

He was probably a lot like Kurt's ex. He could easily picture this innocent looking guy being the one Lizzie had given her virginity to. He had everything. Looks, charm, voice, money, innocence. And he still wasn't good enough for Lizzie. And not only that, she knew it! This oh so perfect guy drove all the way down here to sing to her and she smacked him down right away and sent him running off with his tail between his legs.

The minute the guy had shown up, whatever small glimmer of hope that Puck had held onto that he could be with her one day died. Both of the guys she had been with were so polar opposite from him that it was laughable. He didn't have a damn thing in common with either of them. It was hopeless.

 _How pathetic would it be to seduce her gay cousin because he looks like her? Would I just hate myself a little or would it be like, bone crushingly sad? I mean, he's a guy, so I could probably convince him to drop his standards if I got him horny enough. Assuming I can actually **talk** to the guy._

Puck is almost too busy beating himself up for the sad, pathetic, and all around horrible thought to hear Lizzie screaming,

"Oh my god! You have to be fucking kidding me! Who cares?!" Looking like she has murder on the brain, she continues, "Yes! Seb's a manwhore. Anyone who's known him longer than a month is aware of that, thank you. No need to go slut shaming, Blaine. Just because he's had the misfortune of not being able to keep track of his pants in the past doesn't mean he's not worth dating if he decides that's what he wants! Get the fuck over yourself!"

Puck is struck dumb for long seconds, staring at Lizzie in amazement. _Sebastian used to sleep around? Like... for real? Does that mean a few people or... I dunno, half the PTA for example? Is she really okay with that?_

Later, when he asks her if it's true, she'd giggled and laughed with Seb about his past. Even made jokes about getting tested like it was perfectly normal.

 _Who is this chick? How is she even real?! There's no way anyone should be allowed to be that hot, that talented, and that accepting. I don't care what it takes, I'm going to make her mine. I_ _ **have**_ _to._

* * *

Puck is half way through second period before Finn laughs about the fact that his kissing booth idea had been revamped. He'd also pointed out that since all the girls were taking a shift, they should make more money than he had. Most guys would go back for more than one of them. Especially with girls like Quinn, Santana, and Lizzie working there.

Puck broke out of his daydream with a jolt. Turning to Finn, he says, "Wait, what? Lizzie is doing what?"

Finn snickers and punches him on the arm. "Oh, right. I guess I shouldn't have told you, huh? Don't tell Lizzie it was me. But yeah, she totally got signed up to work the kissing booth."

Turning to face him, suddenly excited, he asks, "When?"

Glancing at his watch, Finn takes a minute to remember the schedule. "Oh! She's up next. In fact her shift starts in about 20 minutes. It costs a dollar a kiss, by the way."

Suddenly swearing under his breath, Puck gets up and runs out of the room without another word to Finn. Blinking at the empty seat, Finn bites his lip.

"I'm so dead. Kurt's going to kill me."

* * *

Getting out of the school had been easy, he'd just run out to his truck while everyone else went to lunch. The reason he was so late was because there was a line at the bank. What should have been a half an hour trip to the ATM took over an hour and Puck was freaking out that he wouldn't make it back in time.

As he's sprinting toward the kissing booth, he has to duck up a staircase, run the full length of the hallway and then take the stairs back down just to avoid Coach Sue. By the time he makes it, he's all but collapsed on the kiosk and panting heavily. He'd barely gotten back in time. He'd spotted Santana, probably there for her shift, walking their way.

Eventually he gets his breathing under control enough to turn around and face the line he'd cut in front of. He'd never been so glad of his reputation than he was at that moment. "I brought enough money to buy out the rest of her time, so you losers can bounce." He glares until the line disperses, then turns back to Lizzie.

She stares at him with wide eyes for a few seconds before coughing slightly and saying, "One dollar limit, sir."

Puck doesn't know whether to curse or bang his head at that news. _I didn't even need to go to a damn ATM! I could have been here as soon as she started if that was the case! Well, clearly I'm just going to have to ignore what she said. I have no trouble paying $50 and just getting one great kiss._

Deciding to wait until after the kiss to give her the actual amount -so she doesn't run away- Puck hands her a dollar.

He can tell by the set of her jaw and the flash of her eyes that she's warning him not to try anything. Luckily Puck has never been real good about listening to the advice -or demands- of others.

He leans in to kiss her and is only slightly put off when she barely touches her lips to his and pulls away. Knowing it's his only chance, he decides to take as much as he can... without coming across as a total pervert.

Before Lizzie can pull all the way back, Puck leans forward again and rubs his lips to hers gently. He spends a few long seconds with his fingers twitching, wanting to thread into her hair. Instead he licks his tongue against her lips once and pulls back before he takes too much. He doesn't want her to feel taken advantage of... well, more than she already probably does.

He's not even standing straight before he suddenly feels her hand wrap around the back of his neck and pull him back toward her. As soon as their lips connect again, it's Lizzie that opens her mouth and drags him closer, trying to push her tongue into his mouth.

Gasping harshly at the turn of events, Puck clenches his fists to resist touching her, afraid it'll break her out of whatever this is. An infinite amount of time later, Puck is pulled from his haze of Lizzie-induced-lust by a very familiar cough.

The sound seems to jolt Lizzie, and she pulls back to stare at him with wide, shocked eyes. Obviously panicking, Lizzie turns to find Santana standing behind her. The smirking Latina announces, "It's shift change, Hummel. Unless you want to continue making a spectacle until your boyfriend shows up."

The reminder of her boyfriend seems to shake Lizzie out of whatever feeling she had been caught in. After taking a second to glance around them, she faces him again and yelps out, "Sorry!" before running away.

Watching her back as she darts around the corner, Puck touches his fingers to his lips. When he realizes that Santana is still smirking at him he realizes that he's standing there acting like a total girl in front of the biggest gossip in glee club. Turning without saying another word to her, Puck walks somewhat unsteadily toward his locker. He'd head to class... but he can't remember where he's supposed to be right now.

There's only room for one thought in his head at the moment. _**She likes me.** She doesn't __**like**_ _that she likes me. She's doing everything she can to hide it, and fight it... but she does._

As he turns to lean against his locker, Puck smiles. _Now I just have to convince her to dump her boyfriend. And resist the temptation of pulling a Finchel and kissing her at regionals. And not let on to Sebastian that we made out. Sure, I want to be with her, but not enough to sabotage their relationship. I want to be_ _ **chosen**_ _, not the last resort._

Sighing heavily, Puck turns to open his locker. _Just once, I want someone to pick_ _ **me**_ _._


	3. Is It Stalking: Through The Binoculars

**So... this turned out longer than expected. I kind of couldn't stop once I started. My bad. Lol Fair warning though, most of this story is directly ripped from the main story. The texting, all I changed were the names and maybe some emoticons because the formatting on FF and AO3 allow different things, other than that, it's the same. It's only the thoughts and actions that are changed. (which is why this is so freaking long) I stopped before the last chapter, bc obviously, we already saw his side of that =P**

* * *

[Sebastian]

When Sebastian had first moved to Ohio, he'd heard about this amazing guy named Blaine. In fact it was pretty much all he'd heard about. As far as everyone in Dalton was concerned Blaine Anderson was King Midas. So of course, Sebastian had jumped at the chance to meet him. He'd fit in seamlessly at Warbler practice and had a blushing virgin look that was Sebastian's kryptonite. He was hot, an awesome singer, and easily flattered; Seb was convinced that he'd finally found a guy that would be able to keep his interest for longer than it took to get his pants off.

But of course... he'd had a boyfriend. That should have bothered him more than it had, but frankly he'd stolen boyfriends before. It really wasn't that hard to get a guy from cheating on his boyfriend to dumping him for you. The fact that Sebastian usually lost interest shortly after was just a sad reality. So many guys were just... typical. They were hot, or awesome in bed, or talented. Pretty much no matter what Sebastian looked for, he got bored. Maybe finding a guy that was all of those things was the answer.

According to the boys of Dalton Academy, a gay boy could do no better than Blaine Anderson. So he'd proceeded with his plans to seduce Blaine even after he'd met Kurt. It had only taken a few minutes for Sebastian to get the feeling that Kurt Hummel was the clingy type that would be smothering Blaine. He'd seemed slightly creepy and overly protective of his boyfriend, so suggesting a night at Scandals had seemed perfect. When Kurt refused to go, that would highlight how boring he was and Seb could weasel in later without the uptight boy around. What he hadn't planned for was for him to step up to the challenge and agree. Rather aggressively. Sebastian would be lying if he said that hadn't sparked his interest but he wasn't stupid. Kurt would never fall for most of the tricks Sebastian used to get guys into bed. He'd have to stick with Blaine, and that wasn't exactly a sacrifice.

Once they'd broken up though, Seb had no idea how to get Blaine to take him seriously. He'd gone up to him once, a few days after his return to Dalton to 'see how he was holding up' and had been brushed off. He hadn't even gotten around to hitting on him. Sebastian needed advice, fast. Better advice than anything he could get from the idiots he knew. He could only think of one person who would obviously know what to do... and he couldn't ask him.

 _Well... not if he knows it's_ _ **me**_ _._

* * *

After spending almost two full days debating, Sebastian finally decides to man up and just do it.

 _It's not like he'll be able to figure it out... Even if he realizes that the texter is talking about Blaine, he won't automatically assume it's me... right? I just have to not be a total dick. Hell, if I'm nice to him, he'll never figure it out._

Disgusted at his need to pep talk himself, Sebastian grabs his phone and scrolls to the contact number that he'd managed to steal off Jeff's phone at practice days ago.

 _ **Me: Can I ask you a question?**_

Sebastian has just sent the message and he's already freaking out. _What if he doesn't answer? I guess that's normal. I wouldn't answer. Some random unknown number texts you, you don't answer it. Especially if you're as stuck up as-_

His thoughts are cut off by the chime of a response, less than a minute later. _Oh, good. At least he's prompt._ The answering text makes him grin before deciding to just charge ahead before he can ask him anything.

 _ **He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named: You have the wrong number.**_

 _ **Me: No, I don't.**_

 _ **Me: How long after a break up do you have to wait before asking someone out?**_

There's a few seconds of silence where Sebastian wonders if Kurt will just blow him off and ignore him before he breathes a heavy sigh of relief.

 _ **He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named: Uh, well I guess that depends.**_

 _ **Me: On...?**_

 _ **He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named: Were you the one that just got out of a relationship? How long were the people involved together? How long has it been since they broke up? Are they male or female? Are you yourself male or female? How old are they? I could go on, but most of those things matter.**_

 _Oh my god. That shit can't **really** matter can it? If I tell him all that he'll figure it out... _

_**Me: Well damn. That requires waaay too much effort.**_

 _ **He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named: Yes, well, relationships tend to do that. Also, who the hell are you? And how did you get my number?**_

 _Nope. Not happening._

 _ **Me: Oh, I can't answer that. That would be telling.**_

 _ **He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named: Yes it would. It would also be less creepy than a random person asking me for relationship advice. Besides, I'm clearly not the person to ask.**_

 _ **Me: You made a relationship work way longer than I ever have. Sure, it crashed and burned, but hey, no ones perfect, right? =D**_

 _ **He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named: I can't decide if you're trying to be nice, and you suck at it, or if you're trying to be an ass and you're good at it.**_

 _Must. resist. rimming. joke._

 _ **Me: Ass. I'm def better with ass.**_

 _ **Me: Being one, that is.**_

 _Well, it could have been worse._

 _ **He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named: Sure. That's what you meant.**_

 _ **He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named: No really, who is this?**_

 _Shit. Time to move this along before he figures it out and blocks me._

 _ **Me: I'm batman. Stop asking questions, that's my job. Okay, let's say for arguments sake that it's them that broke up. They are male and in high school, as am I. They dated... uh I dunno... months, and they broke up like two weeks ago. So how long before I ask him?**_

 _Okay... so that wasn't the best idea. But they only broke up like a week ago, I don't plan to make a move for another week, it all works out. And I have no fucking clue how long they've been dating. Since last school year... so awhile? And surely there are_ _ **some**_ _gay guys around here that aren't named Kurt, Blaine, and Sebastian... right?_

 _ **He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named: Uh... you're creeping me out now. I don't date stalkers, for the record.**_

 _Well shit, apparently not. Deflect!_

 _ **Me: Who said anything about it being you? I haven't even confirmed that I know who you are.**_

 _ **Me: Btw, I totally know who you are.**_

 _ **He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named: Well bully for you.**_

Before Seb can figure out how to proceed, Kurt chimes again.

 _ **He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named: uh... Yogi?**_

 _Now is a weird time to be making up names for each other. And he still hasn't answered my question... Come on, man. I don't know another gay teenage boy with morals... that's not also an idiot._

 _ **Me: That's a terrible nickname. I don't even like picnics. Although I am fond of the idea of calling you BooBoo.**_

 _ **He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named: so... you're not Yogi?**_

 _Oh! That makes more sense. So Kurt doesn't just go around randomly assigning nicknames to people, he legit knows someone named Yogi. Somehow that's not really_ _ **better**_ _though..._

 _ **Me: um... no? Who/what is Yogi?**_

 _ **He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named: The guy who stole my first kiss. Ran into him not that long ago, was just making sure he hadn't taken up stalking in his spare time.**_

 _And people say_ _ **I'm**_ _narcissistic? Kurt just randomly assumes he's being stalked? Jesus. Need to get this moving._

 _ **Me: Nope. I've def never kissed you.**_

 _Ew._

 _ **He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named: Oh, good. That narrows it down to you not being one of 3 people. Only about 7 billion to go. And you've yet to deny that you're stalking me.**_

 _Three? Holy shit how long_ _ **have**_ _they been together? They aren't like... childhood sweethearts that met when they were seven or some shit are they? And for fuck's sake, Paranoid, no one is stalking you!_

 _ **Me: 3? that's kind of sad. But no, I'm not. I just needed your advice.**_

 _ **He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named: What's sad is I only enjoyed 1 of em. The other two were just uncomfortable, for very different reasons. Well, my advice is, if it hasn't been very long, and they were together for months, he probably needs more time. Try to be there for him, maybe drop very heavy hints that you're interested in him, but let him know you'll wait. Just don't pull back so far that someone else cuts in front of you.**_

 _Fair enough. This may have actually been worth it. If nothing else, at least I had a conversation with Kurt that wasn't marred by him looking like he was stepping on a thumbtack the whole time. Well... probably. Maybe that's just his face?_

 _ **Me: Ok, sounds good. Beats the hell out of embarrassing myself.**_

 _ **He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named: Glad I could help? Now if only I had any idea who I was helping. Why even come to me about this? Don't you have friends?**_

 _ **Me: Not smart ones. I haven't known the people near me for very long and I don't trust the people I DO know very much. And I asked you bc you're fairly similar to the guy I like, at least morally.**_

 _Well, actually, it's because I know you're his type so what you do clearly works._

 _ **He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named: Are you implying you have substandard morals? Maybe you shouldn't ask him out at all?**_

 _ **Me: I've made a few bad decisions in the past... plus I've never had a real relationship. Not one that mattered. (elementary school doesn't count right?)**_

 _Hey! I totally had a girlfriend in the fourth grade. Girls are more icky to me now than they were then, but that's not the point!_

 _ **He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named: (no it doesn't) ah, well I'm here if you need a moral compass or whatever. I'm hardly busy. In fact I'm so bored I almost resorted to video games for entertainment.**_

 _ **Me: Oh, that I would love to see.**_

 _ **He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named: *glare* I'll have you know that I'm really good at Mario kart. I just haven't delved into the trauma that is xbox live yet... my brother has been trying to get me to play call of duty for months.**_

 _Kurt Hummel. Playing COD. Oh my god._

 _ **Me: Lmao oh I can tell you exactly how that would go. I'd give it two weeks before he was posting vids on YouTube of you losing your shit.**_

 _ **He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named: Heh, well maybe I'll just scream in french and ruin his fun then. Won't be funny enough to post if no one understands what I'm saying.**_

… _Kurt Hummel screaming obscenities in French... oddly hot. Also, he speaks French? Seriously?_

 _ **Me: Hey, SOME people speak french. Maybe he can hire someone to translate it.**_

 _ **He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named: I love the boy, but he's not that smart.**_

 _This conversation needs to end. And not because I'm now trying to picture Kurt's voice speaking French. It's because it's getting late and all the good showers will be taken. That's my story. And I'm the only one to hear it, so no one knows how false it is. And no one has to know I usually shower in the morning._

 _..._

 _ **Me: Well, on that note, I need to take a shower, so I'm out.**_

 _ **He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named: Bah. Without your riveting conversation I'll be bored again. I guess I can just go to sleep. At least it's after 9 now. 8 was just sad.**_

 _ **Me: 9:30 isn't really better, Booboo.**_

 _ **He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named: O god. You're not really going to start calling me Booboo are you? Trust me, I'm not a bear. Small or otherwise.**_

 _The look on his face if I walked up to him on the street and started calling him Booboo... It might be worth it to be sprayed with Mace._

 _ **Me: LOL I know you're not, I know who you are remember? You're the one that's in the dark.**_

 _ **He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named: I'm not actually sure that's true. You could think I'm someone I'm not. Maybe you got the numbers switched when you dialed? It can't be that hard to find a teenage boy fresh from a break up, with morals.**_

 _Actually, he may have a point. He's been decidedly easier to talk to than Kurt ever was. Maybe it was Blaine keeping that stick wedged up his ass. Oh! The mental images._ _ **Moving on**_ _._

 _ **Me: True. Maybe we'll save name swaps for next time. Or I could keep calling you Booboo. Guess which one gets my vote?**_

 _ **He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named: I think I'm leaning toward you having the wrong number. I can only think of like 3 people who would actually call me that. One of which is a lesbian and you're just not as mean as she is. And you've already said you're not Yogi.**_

 _Implying 'Yogi' is a bit of a dick? Interesting._

 _ **Me: And the third?**_

 _ **He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named: Would have no reason whatsoever to text me... unless he was gloating.**_

 _ **Me: gloating?**_

 _ **He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named: He was trying to steal my boyfriend. I broke up with that bf and then basically chased him right into his arms. I'm not exactly sad over the loss but the fact that the guy in question won? Yeah, not happy about that. Plus I'm pretty sure that he wouldn't want to date someone seriously, and if he did, he wouldn't ask me for help with it. That would imply I know things he doesn't.**_

 _Holy shit, he totally means me. And wow, that's super flattering._ _ **Thanks**_ _Kurt. The fact that he's not wrong isn't the point. If he ever finds out this was me and I needed help dating Blaine, I might actually die of shame. Why am I still talking to him?_

 _ **Me: Wow. Sounds like a real prize, that guy.**_

 _ **He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named: Lol right? I feel sorry for anyone who actually falls for his particular brand of smarm. Actually, I take that back. I really hope Blaine ends up falling for it. After the shit he pulled with me, they deserve each other.**_

 _Again. Thanks. Jesus, how low is Kurt's opinion of me? We've talked twice! Granted, one of those times he may have overheard me propositioning his boyfriend... despite knowing he had a boyfriend... Okay, you win this round Kurt. Time to deflect again!_

 _ **Me: Oh shit! You're not Blaine?! =O**_

 _ **Me: Kidding! Kidding! God, I wish I could see your face right now.**_

 _I bet it's priceless._

 _ **He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named: Asshole! Lol no, you really don't, otherwise you'd be within hitting distance.**_

 _ **Me: Oh, I'm pretty sure I could take you, Booboo.**_

 _Again... mental images. This shouldn't be happening._

 _ **He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named: Damn, you're a jock aren't you? *glare***_

 _Haha! Bitter much?_

 _ **Me: Lacrosse =P**_

 _ **He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named: That's the one with sticks, right? Well, at least I know you don't go to my school. (no lacrosse team) I was starting to get worried this was Puck being an ass. But frankly the lack of 'txting lik dis' is also a pretty big tipping point. That and I blocked his number.**_

 _Wonder why he blocked his number... the world will never know._

 _ **Me: Which one is Puck? I'm assuming he's in nude erections bc you people don't have other friends, right?**_

 _ **He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named: Really? Nude Erections? and hey! I have other friends!**_

 _ **Me: Name one.**_

 _ **He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named: … Jeff.**_

 _ **Me: Isn't he a warbler? Name one that doesn't sing in show choir.**_

 _ **He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named: … shut up. And for the record, Puck is the one with a mohawk. Thought you had to go?**_

 _Oh, damn. He's the hot one. Well, one of them. Sadly none of them are as ugly as they should be... It's fucking show choir! Why is it full of jocks?! Anyway, need to go shower... for innocent reasons. It_ _ **is**_ _late if I plan to... anyway..._

 _ **Me: Shit! Later! I'll txt you to let you know how it goes. Kind of nice to have someone to talk to that isn't a moron!**_

 _Just for that whole 'gloating' thing, will totally be texting you to gloat._

 _ **He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named: What a GLOWING description of me. Thank you so much. Good luck with your guy.**_

 _ **Me: ;D**_

Sebastian takes a quick second to change Kurt's name on his cell, because it was just too damn long. And frankly, Kurt just isn't that nefarious. As he gets up to grab his shower caddy and his sandals, he grins to himself. _Once I'm dating Blaine I can tell Kurt that not only did I get the guy, even if he doesn't seem to care, but that_ _ **he**_ _helped me get him. Can't wait to see his face._

* * *

Sebastian had been so sure that he'd end up dating Blaine that he hadn't really thought about what he would do if it all fell through. The plan had worked fairly well. He'd waited, dropping hints along the way that he was interested in dating Blaine. He'd walked him to classes, even if they were out of the way. He'd given Blaine solos that he'd previously been fighting him over. He'd even listened to Blaine's complaints about things Sebastian had absolutely no fucking interest in.

So when he'd asked Blaine out to dinner, he'd gotten a small smile and an "Of course!" Sebastian had even made sure to ask him if he was ready to date, because he didn't want to blow his chance. He'd gone out of his way to make sure Blaine knew he would wait. The smaller, gel covered boy had assured him that wasn't necessary. And then the Dinner-From-Hell had commenced.

Blaine had seemed a little down from the beginning but Seb has just assumed it was nerves. It was a first date after all... Normal. **No**. By the time they got to the restaurant, Sebastian was ready to stab something. All he'd heard about the whole trip was how Blaine couldn't believe he was having to attempt dating again. He'd never have guessed he'd be back in this position so quickly. He was so sure that Kurt had been The One. It had only gotten worse at dinner.

By the time the food came, Blaine was all but weeping into his pasta. Sebastian had been half horrified and half impressed. _What the hell has Kurt done to deserve this amount of devotion? This is just_ _ **sad**_ _._

After he'd dropped Blaine back off at home with his food in a to-go box, because **no** , Sebastian had flung himself back on his bed and debated for about 30 seconds before texting Kurt.

 _ **Me: So, that was possibly the worst meal of my life. And I'm forced to go to political dinners!**_

He'd barely had time to strip out of his button up shirt and fling it across the room before he'd gotten a response chime.

 _ **Not Being Stalked: o no! Lol what happened?**_

 _ **Me: He SAID he was over the break up, and that he'd go out with me, and we did. I took him to dinner... but he spent the whole time talkin about his ex and whining about how it wasn't fair, didn't he know they belonged together?! Bur bur bur. I stopped listening after the first 20 fucking minutes.**_

 _ **Not Being Stalked: LOL aww! I'm so sorry. Maybe give it more time? Although it sounds like it'll take awhile for him to recover or they'll end up back together.**_

Seb snorts. _Not likely. Not only have you made no attempt to even talk to Blaine since he left, you never guessed that_ _ **he**_ _was the one I was talking about. Just you. So clearly you couldn't give a shit._

 _ **Me: Uh, I doubt they'll get back together. The other guy seems to not care, like at all. Moved on within like 5 minutes near as I can tell. Makes me wonder what really happened when they broke up. Somehow I think the side of the story I got left some things out.**_

 _ **Not Being Stalked: Probably, most guys don't like to admit when they did something stupid or wrong. God only knows what Blaine is telling people about our breakup.**_

 _Actually, at first he'd been pissed off and muttered a lot about Kurt being a prude and being over sensitive. Then he'd refused to talk about it again. He'd led everyone to assume that Kurt's delicate nature couldn't handle things like the touching of penises. Makes ya wonder why he's dating guys if he doesn't want to touch them...?_

 _ **Me: Lol don't suppose you'll tell me what actually happened so I can at least set rumors straight if I hear them? =P**_

 _ **Not Being Stalked: Sure! Maybe you'll screw up and I'll hear about someone going around knowing the whole story, because I haven't told anyone else, so I'd def know who it was =)**_

 _Oh, shit. Yeah. That wouldn't end well. Dammit._

 _ **Me: nvm... You could tell me anyway and I'll just not tell anyone? =D**_

 _ **Not Being Stalked: lol honestly it's not that surprising how it all fell apart, but it IS personal. I don't know you, you won't tell me who you are, why should I tell you something that could potentially embarrass me if it got out?**_

 _ **Me: ...bc I want you to?**_

 _ **Not Being Stalked: O, well in that case... *rolls eyes***_

 _ **Me: um... I'd send you an embarrassing picture of me or something to keep as blackmail but then you'd know who I am... so that's a no. uh... oh come on! You said it wasn't surprising, would it really be that bad if other people DID find out? What could I possibly do with the information?**_

 _ **Not Being Stalked: Tell everyone ever... and no, not really. It's just... it's about sex and the last thing I want is everyone finding out details about my sex life.**_

Seb cocks an eyebrow. _So it was true? Kurt's just really that much of a prude? Ugh._

 _ **Me: uh... no offense intended (not right now anyway) but... what sex life? You couldn't look more virgin-esque if you wore all white and tied bows in your hair.**_

 _ **Not Being Stalked: Omg. Thank you so much. I'm so glad you didn't mean that offensively. Jesus.**_

 _Again... his face! Kind of wishing we were sitting public so I could be watching his expressions while we have this talk. Maybe I could catch him out somewhere and hide behind a pillar or something. … When did this get so creepy?_

 _ **Me: Lol sorry! But it's true! If you've had sex, my name is Susan.**_

 _ **Not Being Stalked: Only Susan I know is Britt, so I guess you have me there. Although I'm not sure I do know you... have we ever actually met or are you just a creeper who somehow knows all about my life without actually being a part of it?**_

Sebastian shifts uncomfortably. _Ok, bend the truth... don't break it._

 _ **Me: We've met... we even had a conversation once! But no, I don't really know you that well. And what I do know I found out through a mutual friend, the one time we actually talked it wasn't the deep soul searching kind. Frankly you're just kind of infamous in Lima. The first gay and all that. Which isn't fair, I'm sure I was out before you were, I just didn't live here at the time. =(**_

 _ **Not Being Stalked: Well, sorry, you can't have my crown. Or my scepter.**_

 _The image of him with both shouldn't be_ _ **that**_ _easy to imagine..._

 _ **Me: … you totally have a crown and a scepter don't you?**_

 _ **Not Being Stalked: Yes.**_

 _ **Me: That should surprise me more than it does... Be glad I don't actually know where you live, or I'd come for them. One of these days, they'll mysteriously disappear, and you'll know... I found you.**_

 _ **Not Being Stalked: Thanks for the warning, now I need to get an alarm or something. I went through great personal trauma for that crown, I'm not about to let it get stolen. However, if you tell me your name I'll let you take a picture wearing it. I'll even let you borrow the kilt so that we'll match.**_

 _He has a kilt... that he wore... with the crown and scepter._

 _ **Me: ...what?**_

 _ **Not Being Stalked: Nothing. lol All I'm going to say on the subject of our break up was that he suddenly decided he WAS ready to have sex, but it didn't really have anything to do with things like 'loving me' or 'wanting me'. Toss in a little drunken groping with a side of NO MEANS NO and you've got one failed relationship.**_

 _ **He**_ _was ready? Implying that it hadn't been Kurt putting the breaks on, but Blaine? And then Blaine was... what? Molesting him? I really need more to this story. But I know better than to ask. Dammit._

 _ **Me: Whoa lol ok, yeah, I doubt that's the version he's telling.**_

 _Polar opposite really._

 _ **Not Being Stalked: Somehow I doubt it, yeah. He's probably making me out to be oversensitive and judgy or something. Whatevs. He's officially not my problem anymore. Now I can just stand back and wait for the hordes of gay men that were waiting on me to be single. No really. I'll wait.**_

 _That should sound cocky... but he means it as a joke... Kurt Hummel being self-depreciating..._

 _ **Me: Lol if there are hordes of gay men in Lima, Ohio and I've missed them, I'm going to be really upset. Unless your type is a 40 yr old drag queen, you're pretty much out of luck. Hardly anyone is out around here.**_

 _ **Not Being Stalked: O trust me, I'm aware. For a long time I was the only gay person I knew. Then I met Blaine, found out about Yogi, and Santana was shoved out of her closet. I've recently met a few more but really, no one I'd date. I still can't figure out who you are. I must not have known you were gay... =(**_

 _Oh, good. I don't even make the list. Fuck you too, Kurt. Even if I'm included in the 'people he wouldn't date' that's not good news. Not that I want to date Kurt... Not the point._

 _ **Me: Nu uh, no fishing for clues. I'm not responding to that at all. Is Santana the cheerleader from the commercial? I heard something about how she hadn't actually been out and that guy was just a dick about it. I didn't know you were friends.**_

 _ **Not Being Stalked: Well, friends is a strong word. We're in glee together. She's like Puck. One of the popular kids that puts up with us weirdos.**_

 _ **Me: Ah. Well, who knows? Maybe someone at your school will come out now that you're single. No reason to come out if the guy you like is taken, etc. Esp with Blaine gone, you could very well have guys popping up out of the woodwork to confess.**_

 _I mean, just because Kurt isn't_ _ **my**_ _type doesn't mean he's not date worthy. I'm sure he'll end up with someone fairly quickly._

 _ **Not Being Stalked: Somehow I doubt it. I've actually never had someone confess to me, unless Blaine counts. Which it shouldn't, I liked him first and it took him months to decide I was date-able.**_

 _ **Me: Uh what about the other 2 ppl you kissed?**_

 _ **Not Being Stalked: One was a girl who just wanted to kiss every guy in the school and Yogi didn't like me, I don't think. He was just confused and very, very mad.**_

 _Mad? What? Oh, right. He said his first kiss was stolen. Yogi must be from Narnia. And normally I wouldn't count girls for gay guys, but his count is only three, so I'm not taking it from him. That's just sad._

 _ **Me: That sucks. Still, just because guys haven't admitted to liking you doesn't mean no one does. We've already said no one is out here.**_

 _ **Not Being Stalked: Heh, I really don't think that's the problem. I'm not exactly the type of guy people drool over. Doesn't matter. Soon enough I'll be in New York and I'll either find someone there or be so busy that I don't notice my lack of man.**_

Sebastian sits back and stares at his phone for a long minute. _Does he really think no one finds him attractive? Seriously? He was dating the most sought after guy from Dalton, a prestigious private school full of rich dudes. And he's... ya know. Anyway... right. He's a senior. He's graduating in a few months..._

 _ **Me: I didn't know you were going to New York next year, college?**_

 _ **Not Being Stalked: Yep! I applied for NYADA.**_

 _I haven't actually seen him perform, but I've heard enough about him to last a lifetime. If he's half as amazing as Blaine claims, he'll probably get in. Still... maybe he has some back ups close by? Not that it matters..._

 _ **Me: And?**_

 _ **Not Being Stalked: And what? I haven't been accepted yet or anything, it's only November.**_

 _ **Me: No, where else did you apply? Just NY schools or did you leave some Ohio ones for backups?**_

 _ **Not Being Stalked: Oh, just NYADA. That's the one I'm going to. If I apply somewhere else, it's like admitting that I might not get in. Don't want to jinx it.**_

 _ **What?!**_ _I didn't think schools even let you do that! He only applied for one college? And it's a super fucking selective one?!_

 _ **Me: … are you an idiot?**_

 _ **Not Being Stalked: What? It's a perfectly valid decision! Rachel and I did it together.**_

 _ **Me: Wow, you really are that stupid huh?**_

 _Okay, that was rude... but seriously? How crazy do you have to be to risk your entire future that way? Jesus fucking Christ._

 _ **Not Being Stalked: I'm not stupid just because I refuse to admit defeat. I'll get into NYADA, so it doesn't matter. Why waste money on application fees?**_

 _Ohhh no. I'm not talking to him about this. If he's that stupid, then obviously he can't handle basic motor functions, let alone holding a conversation._

 _ **Me: Nope. Sorry. I was only talking to you because I thought you had a higher IQ than the average moron around here, apparently I was wrong.**_

 _ **Not Being Stalked: Screw you, jerk! You don't know anything about me!**_

 _ **Me: Clearly.**_

 _Idiot._

* * *

When Kurt finally comes around and starts texting him again, Seb has to fight off a victorious fist punch. At first he'd only talked to him out of pure boredom. His classes, even at Dalton, weren't as hard as he was used to in France. He finished his work fairly easily and was usually just laying around his dorm trying to pretend he was off doing impressive things to keep his rep up. Sadly, he was usually just laying in bed talking to Kurt Hummel about things like their families and Kurt's 'lack of sex appeal'.

At first Sebastian had just assumed that Kurt was being coy and fishing for compliments, but it quickly became apparent that he actually believed he wasn't attractive. _Okay, so he's not my usual type, but he's pretty. Who the hell made him think he wasn't fuckable? His ass_ _ **alone**_ _... no. Not going there._

When he'd specifically talked about how Seb himself had treated him, he'd felt like the lowest of scum. To be fair, he hadn't known then that Kurt had self esteem issues. Or that Kurt would take it so hard even if he did. In one conversation Kurt had made it abundantly clear that he didn't think much of himself and didn't think anyone else did either. The fact that he'd then topped it off by calling Seb hot was just... a twisted knife.

 _Kurt hates me, but even with the amount of animosity he has toward me, he can admit I'm hot. He's a much better person than I am._

That thought had been enough to compel him to force his real feelings about Kurt out. It was embarrassing to admit that he found Kurt pretty but at least Kurt didn't know who he was.

That conversation had changed things for Sebastian that he was immediately unhappy to have changed. He didn't want to see Kurt as a person with feelings and insecurities, he wanted to see him as the stuck up, sometimes funny ex boyfriend of the guy he used to like; the Dinner-from-Hell had killed that crush pretty quickly. Instead he was forced to think about Kurt objectively as a dating prospect just to ease his conscious. The results weren't good news for Sebastian. Taking the Blaine factor out, Kurt was pretty... well, pretty.

That conversation had just left him with the hope that he'd never be forced into a situation where he saw Kurt acting sexy. Now that he knew the intelligence and wit behind the pretty face, if he started thinking about him being actively hot, he was screwed.

* * *

By the time sectionals comes around, he really should have known better than to jinx it. The mental images he'd gotten of Kurt learning stripper moves from Blondie McLips were definitely not enough to prepare him for the horror of actually seeing Kurt giving off sex faces and doing body rolls.

He'd been informed, by more than just Blaine, that when the Warblers had attempted a sexy number, Kurt had pulled stupid faces and confused everyone more than anything else, but apparently Lips was a much better teacher. As Sebastian sits in the audience three seats from Blaine, he has to shift uncomfortably and pull his jacket over his lap a bit to hide his hard on. Kurt had not only learned how to roll his body but he was also swinging his hips and making faces that one doesn't usually make while clothed. If Sebastian hadn't been so turned on he'd have been laughing at the look of outrage on Blaine's face. He'd looked like he wanted to climb over every seat between him and the stage and was all but vibrating in his seat.

After that Seb had dropped all pretense of not finding Kurt hot. It was pointless. The image of Kurt's hips swaying had been permanently etched into his brain and was never coming out. Sadly, he couldn't act on it, because Kurt still thought Sebastian was a total slimeball. And it was hard to argue against that.

Despite still refusing to tell Kurt who he is, Sebastian finds himself becoming creepier and creepier with each passing day. He stalks Kurt's facebook everyday, texts him constantly and starts referring to him as 'babe', something he's only ever done with the few fuck buddies or 'boyfriends' he's had. Even one night stands or people like Blaine, that he'd tried to sleep with, had only ever gotten stupid nicknames like 'sport' or 'killer'. But Kurt was definitely a babe. If the name bothered Kurt, he made no mention of it.

It wasn't until Sebastian started overtly crossing the line that things became difficult to handle.

 _ **Me: I'm bored.**_

 _ **Totally Being Stalked: Lol Awww. I'm sorry. Personally, I'm annoyed. My house is so freaking loud atm. Finn and Sam have Puck, Mike and Artie over since we started xmas hols. They're playing xbox, and throwing stuff at each other. So I'm hiding. I don't expect it to last much longer. Sam at least will hunt me down eventually. =(**_

Sebastian glares at his screen. It's an old argument, that Kurt finds ridiculous, but Seb stands by it.

 _ **Me: lol I'm still not sure Sam isn't trying to get in your pants.**_

 _ **Totally Being Stalked: *rolls eyes* He's really not. Sam is straight. They're all straight. Which isn't fair. Because I'm a gay virgin in an unsupervised house with 5 reasonably attractive-very hot guys and not a single one of them wants me. Porn has lied to me.**_

 _Stop thinking about other guys being hot... you said I was hot once! Go back to that. Ugh. When did I turn into a Twilight extra? Oh, yeah. I'm supposed to be a supportive friend, not a jealous ass._

 _ **Me: LOL It's still funny to me that you're new to porn.**_

 _It's also hot. But, ya know._

 _ **Totally Being Stalked: Ah, the joys of youth. It was one thing to not like it when I was 16 and didn't even know how sex really worked. Oh, how quickly that changed. Although I still probably don't watch as much as most guys.**_

 _I'd kill to find out what kind of porn he watches..._

 _ **Me: Def not as much as I do ;)**_

 _ **Totally Being Stalked: Safe bet. You're a total pervert.**_

 _If you knew how true that was, you'd have blocked me weeks ago._

 _ **Me: Aww! Thanks, babe! But no, srsly, keep an eye on Sam. I don't trust him. *shifty eyes***_

 _ **Totally Being Stalked: Lol You're ridiculous.**_

 _Nope. Actually I'm dead serious. One of those guys downstairs right now wants in Kurt's pants. I just can't figure out who. Probably Puck. But Sam lives there, so he has access._

 _ **Me: Come on! I can believe that one guy can live with you and not make a move, but two? Nope. He's molesting you in your sleep or something.**_

 _ **Totally Being Stalked: *sigh* Are you off your meds?**_

 _ **Me: Lol Anyway, I would assume Finn was too, but clearly if he'd wanted you, he could have had you.**_

 _ **Totally Being Stalked: LOL So could Sam, trust me.**_

 _What?! No! He's never said anything about being into Sam! And he's definitely not allowed to start now! I might make a move... some day... okay, no I won't, because he'd kill me. But still, NO!_

 _ **Me: Hey! None of that!**_

 _ **Totally Being Stalked: Uh, why? Srsly, you've said yourself that he's hot. And it's not like it matters, he's not gay!**_

 _ **Me: He doesn't have to be! (and I'm not so sure he's not) He just has to find tiny hips and bright eyes attractive enough to not care! =(**_

 _Plenty of 'straight' guys will mess around with gay guys if they're horny enough... just no. I don't like this. Go back to talking about how hot 'Seb' is._

 _ **Totally Being Stalked: ya know, you really aren't allowed to play the jealous bf when we aren't dating. Esp when you won't TELL ME YOUR NAME.**_

 _Do you really think if I could, I wouldn't have by now? This is freaking_ _ **killing**_ _me._

 _ **Me: Ugh. Not this again. I can't tell you! You'll hate me!**_

 _ **Totally Being Stalked: I won't hate you! You're one of my best friends at this point.**_

 _Just what every boy wants to hear._

 _ **Me: *deadpan* That's hot.**_

 _ **Totally Being Stalked: This is ridiculous! I thought you said you were sexy?**_

 _ **Me: I am! It's just... you didn't seem into me at all when we met. And I know you a lot better now than I did then, you WON'T like me.**_

 _Okay, if I had met him randomly at the mall or something or even at Scandals, I'm sure I would have had a chance... but after all the shit I pulled trying to get into Blaine fucking Anderson's pants... I blew it before I even knew what I was doing!_

 _ **Totally Being Stalked: UGH. You have a choice to make. Tell me your name so that we can at least meet for real, or stop getting jealous when I talk about other guys. It's not fair that you know who I am, can see me all the time (through facebook if nothing else. I smell you, creeper.) but I can't know anything about what you look like or where you go to school or anything.**_

 _Me telling him that I'm_ _ **at least**_ _half in love with him probably wouldn't help this. Ugh. It's really not fair... I know that... but I just don't know how much longer I can listen to him talk about other guys..._

 _ **Me: *sigh* I get it. But it's really not fair to me either. I know, without a shadow of a doubt, that you wouldn't like me. I'm more sure of this than you are of NYADA, and you were willing to risk your whole career on that. PLEASE let it go. I'll stop bugging you about other guys. Just don't shut me out.**_

 _ **Totally Being Stalked: I won't, like I said, you're one of my best friends... and it's not like it matters about other guys. Sam IS straight. So is everyone else. Or at least they pretend to be when I'm around =P**_

 _ **Me: Lol trust me, with that ass, they HAVE to be straight to have not copped a feel. I never got a chance, I was too stupid and wrapped up in the dinner-from-hell guy. =(**_

 _ **Totally Being Stalked: Poor baby, you didn't get to molest someone you didn't even know. How is this you NOT being a stalker?**_

 _You think you're kidding, but the things I would do to you if given half the chance... Okay, seriously... The creepy factor is off the charts at this point. I wouldn't_ _ **actually**_ _molest him against his will... right? I'm like... 90% sure I could hold back. I really need to change the subject. Or at least play it off like a joke..._

 _ **Me: I never said I wasn't a stalker. I've accepted that about myself. Btw, your hair is sticking up in the back, you may want to straighten it before Sam comes in.**_

 _ **Totally Being Stalked: … you're lying. You're not really out there.**_

 _We text too often. I_ _ **know**_ _what he's going to do._

 _ **Me: Lol Then why did you check?**_

 _ **Totally Being Stalked: ?! Are you really outside?**_

 _ **Me: No. Get away from the window.**_

 _ **Totally Being Stalked: OMG! You can't have my crown! It's MINE!**_

 _ **Me: Lmao oh come on! The closet is the first place I'd look!**_

 _ **Totally Being Stalked: HOW ARE YOU DOING THIS?! I'M ON THE SECOND FLOOR!**_

 _ **Me: I'm in a tree with binoculars. That or I'm laying on my bed and I just know you too fucking well. Either/or.**_

Seb has to stop and remind himself that actually climbing into a tree with binoculars would definitely be crossing a line.

 _ **Totally Being Stalked: Hmph. We need to talk less.**_

 _ **Me: Probably true. But then you'd be playing xbox... so...**_

 _ **Totally Being Stalked: Bring on the stalker!**_

 _ **Me: LOL**_

* * *

When Sebastian's parents abandon him to the mercy of the crowd, he immediately finds a table and decides to waste time by scrolling through all of his previous conversations with Kurt. Just because, ya know, he wasn't being pathetic enough. _God. There really is something wrong with me. He's just a_ _ **guy**_ _. A hot guy, sure... but why am I so wrapped up in him? It's sad._

He fights to keep a bored, sullen teenager look on his face as he scrolls through their old texts, hopefully giving off 'leave me alone' vibes. When he gets to one of their more recent conversations where Kurt had listed his smirk in with Sam's abs and Puck's arms, he grins. _Sure, it'd have been nice to be the only one he talked about, but those guys are his friends... he barely knows 'Seb' and I still made the list!_

It's not until he gets a message from Kurt a few minutes later that he realizes how far gone he is. _Just the chime is enough to have me almost fucking bouncing in my seat. Jeez._

 _ **Totally Being Stalked: Ugh! Screw this whole day.**_

 _ **Me: Lol what now? I promise you're not having a worse time than I am.**_

 _ **Totally Being Stalked: O, don't be so sure. But you first, just in case I have to lie and embellish to make it worse.**_

 _ **Me: Lol I'm stuck 'having dinner' with my parents. I haven't actually seen either of them in a good 20 minutes, but they still like to drag me out like a show pony.**_

 _ **Totally Being Stalked: Aww lol poor baby. What do you mean 'having dinner'?**_

Before Sebastian can respond, he's distracted by an 'old friend' of his father's that just stopped by 'for a chat'. Despite the man's best attempts at playing casual, Sebastian can tell that he's there to dig up dirt on the 'new State's Attorney' not to shoot-the-shit. Everyone thinks just because he's a teenager that he's stupid enough to air his family's dirty laundry. After the man's third less than subtle prodding question, he finally gets the hint that Sebastian isn't going to give anything up, and makes his excuses.

As soon as the man is gone, Seb whips his phone back out and replies.

 _ **Me: Sorry! Having to make small talk is the worst.**_

 _ **Totally Being Stalked: np. I'm just bored. Small talk with who? Thought your parents were MIA?**_

 _ **Me: Oh, they are. It was some random guy my dad works with, or something. I wasn't really listening. Luckily he was called away.**_

 _ **Totally Being Stalked: Well that's good. Now you're all mine! Trust me, I need the distraction. Quick! Say something funny!**_

Sebastian had been wrapped in his own head about his dad's new job and all the trouble it was causing and is only too happy to be distracted by Kurt. He takes a second to try and think of something amusing. Glancing around the room, he eyes the buffet table with a vague scowl. Eventually he smiles, thinking of Kurt's reaction to the text, knowing it's one of the few things he would probably feel the same way about even if he knew it was Sebastian saying it. _How screwed up is it that I'm this happy about him being amused by my pain?_

 _ **Me: Of course I'm yours, babe. No one else is worth the time ;) As for funny... I dunno. I burned myself on a chafing dish earlier, you probably find that funny. Asshole.**_

It takes a few minutes to get a reply, which worries Sebastian for a few seconds before his phone finally beeps.

 _ **Totally Being Stalked: LOL I do indeed. But on with my story, so tonight I was supposed to be shooting a tv special with the glee club and I didn't get to do it. My dad guilted me into helping him and now I'm bored out of my mind while all of my friends (and my brother, the traitor) get to do something fairly amazing for high school students. Ugh. I may never talk to anyone in my house again.**_

 _His responses are a little slow tonight, he must be distracted. At least he's still texting with me, despite whatever it is his dad is asking him to do._

 _ **Me: That sucks, babe. Don't worry though, I'm sure you'll get another chance to do something amazing.**_

 _ **Totally Being Stalked: Aww, thanks! Um...you never explained to me what you meant by dinner btw.**_

 _ **Me: Another one of those damned political dinners I have to go to. There's no one here my age and most of these people only talk to me to either kiss up to my dad or try to get dirt on him. Hate these things.**_

After almost two full minutes of no response, Seb starts to worry a bit. Kurt is usually really quick to reply, and sure, he'd been a little slow tonight, but going on three minutes is a bit much. Eventually, his mind spins out of control on him and he can't stop himself from being a bit paranoid.

 _ **Me: Please tell me you aren't like, looking up political dinners in our area and all of their attendees, and their sons, or something.**_

Luckily he gets a reply right away, but his relief is short lived.

 _ **Totally Being Stalked: Nope, but what a wonderful idea! I'm going to do that right now.**_

 _Oh god, I gave him ideas! Not good!_

 _ **Me: Oh shit! No! Stop! Abort! Um... how bout I tell you something really embarrassing and you stop what you're doing? =D**_

 _ **Totally Being Stalked: It'd have to be something really good, hun. I REALLY want to know who you are.**_

 _Fuck. My. Life._

 _ **Me: Um... ok. Prepare for a novel...**_

 _ **Me: So when I was a freshman, I was really quiet, and kind of shy. I was fairly popular but I only had about 5 friends I would consider close and most of them were girls. They found out that I had a crush on a friend of mine... I'd liked him for a few months but didn't admit it because I didn't know if he was gay. I let it slip to my friends during a party... The next school day, one by one, they all come up to me to tell me that they had asked him if he liked guys. A couple of them had even told the guy that they were asking because I liked him! I had one class with him and one of the guys that went to the party was in the class with us. I sat down, afraid to even look at the guy (because no, he didn't like me, duh) and I just really wanted him to know that I did NOT ask them to talk to him.**_

 _ **Me: So I turned to the friend and was like "Don't you hate it when you tell your friends that you like someone and they ALL turn around and tell them about it?! I'm never telling them anything ever again." I figured this way, he'd know I didn't ask them to, but we didn't have to actually talk about it. And it would have been fine... except this dumbass friend of mine got all offended and yelled, "Hey! I didn't tell him you liked him!" then the idiot TURNS TO THE BOY and says, "I didn't tell you he liked you, did I?!" … I can not stress to you how awkward this moment was. My entire face was bright red, I could feel the heat coming off it. I didn't even say anything, I just dropped my head down to the desk and refused to look up. We never mentioned it again. Well, the boy didn't. My friends brought it up right up until the day I moved away *glare***_

After typing out one of his most embarrassing moments, Sebastian just kind of wants to curl up and die. _This better be good enough to keep him from digging too hard... if I told him all that just for him to turn around and figure out who I am, I'll die._

 _ **Totally Being Stalked: OMG lol That's so cute!**_

 _ **Me: No it's not! It's embarrassing! Never mention this again.**_

 _ **Totally Being Stalked: Aww, I think it's sweet. It's not like YOU did it. No wonder you didn't go to your friends for advice about the guy you liked though, if that was your experience on it.**_

 _ **Me: Exactly. Clearly even friends can't be trusted.**_

 _ **Totally Being Stalked: You trusted me. =P**_

Seb hesitates for a small second before smiling to himself.

 _ **Me: Well that's different. You're Kurt.**_

It was the first time he'd ever actually typed out his name, but it seemed like it was time. _Maybe when he_ _ **does**_ _find out who I am, he won't hate me too much if he knows without a doubt that I talked to him and told him these things willingly..._

 _ **Totally Being Stalked: Um lol well I'm glad you trusted me. I was happy to help.**_

 _ **Me: Considering how that 'date' turned out, you shouldn't be THAT happy.**_

 _ **Totally Being Stalked: Lol oh, but I am. See, if I'd helped you actually date that boy, you wouldn't be here flirting with me, right? =P I got to help you and still keep you to myself! Win-win!**_

Seb can feel the pleased blush settling over his face and hopes no one is paying attention to him. Smiling to himself, he replies,

 _ **Me: LOL Yep. All yours, babe.**_

 _ **Totally Being Stalked: Lol Well, my dad has finally remembered I exist so I have to go. I'll probably crash when I get home, so good night, hun!**_

 _ **Me: Night babe!**_

After Kurt slips into radio silence, Sebastian goes back to rereading their old texts for the rest of the night. He's half way through their newest conversation when his parents finally showed back up and said they could go. As he walks out of the pompous hotel he wishes he'd been able to invite Kurt along to keep him entertained instead of just reading over their old conversations. _Maybe one day, if I manage to actually man up, I can get him to go to one of these things. I'd_ _ **love**_ _to see peoples' reaction to his wardrobe._

* * *

Sebastian's been nervous since the dinner... Kurt had seemed distracted. And sure, maybe that was because of whatever his father had him doing, but it was the earliest he had said good night in weeks, and that worried him a little. _Maybe he's getting tired of talking to a faceless dude that refuses to meet him? What am I gonna do?! I can't actually tell him who I am, he'll freaking kill me._

Just when Seb was sinking into a depression over the whole thing, Kurt had texted to tell him he was 'reclaiming the Lima Bean' and Sebastian couldn't resist the opportunity to see him in the flesh. Even as himself.

Since he lives barely outside the Lima city limits, Sebastian makes good time in getting there and is still texting Kurt as he steps inside, carefully facing the front so he's not noticed before he's ready.

 _ **Me: So what are you doing?**_

 _ **Totally Being Stalked: Well, I brought a book, but I seemed to have been distracted by this guy who won't stop texting me =P**_

 _ **Me: Oh no! Sounds horrible. You should tell him to leave you alone. You're mine, remember? ;)**_

If Seb is blushing a little from flirting with Kurt while in the actual room with Kurt, well, no one will notice, right?

 _ **Totally Being Stalked: If I had a name to give him that might make it easier.**_

 _ **Me: He doesn't have to know it's not the right name. Tell him my name is Bob.**_

 _ **Totally Being Stalked: … is your name Bob? Because I'll be honest... that could be a deal-breaker.**_

 _ **Me: Lmao What's wrong with Bob?**_

 _ **Totally Being Stalked: Well if for no other reason, I could never whisper your name in your ear to turn you on or call it out in sex. I mean... Bob? No.**_

Sebastian had been ready to laugh at Kurt's ridiculous reason, not at all prepared for the innuendo or the mental image of the smaller boy calling out his name during sex. After flailing slightly and falling into the person in front of him, all Seb wants to do is run for the hills before Kurt notices he's there and sees him acting like a total spaz. Instead all he can do is hear his name gasped in Kurt's voice on loop in his head. _Oh my fucking god, this man might actually kill me._

 _ **Me: Jesus Christ, babe! Warn a guy! I'm in public you know? Thank god I wasn't eating. I gotta go for about 20 minutes, text you in a few.**_

 _ **Totally Being Stalked: Aww! But I wanted to discuss calling your name out during sex some more! =(**_

 ** _Me: Babe! Uncool! Public!_** ** _Stop it!_**

Sebastian does his best to push the blush down and pocket his phone. _That voice will stop soon, right? Because I don't think I can talk to Kurt like a rational person with those thoughts in my head._

As he takes his coffee and walks toward Kurt's table he notices the small but genuine smile on Kurt's face while he's typing on his phone. As soon as he's done the phone in Sebastian's pocket vibrates. _Oh god, try not to think about what he just said to put that smirk on his face._

When he stops at Kurt's table, the countertenor puts his phone down and looks up at Sebastian with a cocked eyebrow. Considering how they'd technically left things with the whole Blaine situation, Seb had expected a much worse welcome.

Ignoring the awkwardness of talking to a boy he's falling for like he's almost a complete stranger, Sebastian tries to make his mouth work. Eventually he manages a small smirk and says, "Well, well! Fancy seeing you here! Haven't seen you around. Avoiding the overwhelming scent of hair gel and longing looks?"

Kurt seems to hesitate a second before replying, "Something like that. I heard from someone that he was still talking like he wanted to get back together awhile back, and that is definitely not happening. Easier to avoid the whole thing all together."

Seb wants to gape at him. _Is he talking about me? 'His stalker'?_ Instead of asking, he chuckles, pulling the chair across from Kurt out and sitting down. "Wow. Your tune sure has changed. When we first met you had me thinking you were picking out china patterns."

Snorting, Kurt takes a sip of coffee. "Yeah, I had myself convinced of that too. Luckily my common sense kicked in."

Sebastian has a mental battle with himself. Should he continue to be the asshole Kurt knows him as, or try to pave the way for the eventual reveal? Deciding that somewhere in the middle would be best, he says, "Well, there's a first time for everything... he still hasn't jumped on the bandwagon. He still talks about you, so if you're going to come here, be prepared to commence evasive maneuvers."

Kurt surprisingly smiles before answering with, "Thanks for the warning."

Sebastian sips his coffee while eying Kurt slowly. _I don't really know what to do with this. He's..._ "You seem happy. It's so weird to see you perfectly content when he's so torn up about it. I figured you would be, at the very least, indignant." Which is true. Blaine is still a hot mess. He's better at faking it now but he still talks about Kurt constantly and sighs more than a 13 year old girl with her first crush.

Kurt shakes his head before answering. "The way we broke up was fairly horrible, but I'm over it. It's been two months and... I like someone else. So, I'm not real hung up on my last boyfriend."

Sebastian had just taken a sip of his coffee and quickly chokes on it. Kurt passes him a napkin and Seb tries to figure out the best way to not blurt out questions about who he likes. _It has to be me right? Well, the 'stalker'? He doesn't have_ _ **time**_ _to talk to anyone else. Unless I was right about Sam or something... but he'd have mentioned that... right? Except I told him not to... shit!_

"Y- you like someone else? Who? How many gay guys could you possibly know?"

Kurt shrugs, taking another drink of his coffee. "Well, for one, I said I liked him, not that he liked me back. I haven't actually told him, so I don't know how he'd feel about it."

 _Shit. It could be Sam... he's definitely implied that he'd be into his 'stalker' if they could meet up, so I doubt he means me... Not that he actually_ _ **would**_ _be into me if he knew... fuck. It's totally Sam._ Kurt smiles at Seb, pushing his chair out.

"Well, it's been nice seeing you, Sebastian. I've got to go, I have a previous engagement. Merry Christmas!" Seb frowns as he watches Kurt wave and head for the door, throwing away his empty cup as he goes.

 _He didn't say anything about needing to be somewhere... When I told him I'd text him in 20 minutes, he hadn't said he'd be busy. Is he one of those people that text no matter where he is? I'm almost always locked away in my dorm or my room when we text. It's... private. I don't want people asking me questions or distracting me... He must not be taking this as serious as I am. Shit, why should he? I'm just some words on a screen to him._

* * *

Eventually Sebastian heaves himself out of his chair and slowly walks out to his car. He gets home and just lays on his bed, staring at the envelope that he'd carefully picked out from a stationary store over a week ago. Inside is the information about the dance and singing classes he'd payed and signed Kurt up for. The current plan is to have it delivered the first day back at school at McKinley. The small silver keychain with the words 'Je t'aime' he still wasn't sure about. He does love Kurt... but he doesn't know if it's fair to tell him so without revealing himself first. He just kind of wanted Kurt to have something to remember him by when he goes off to New York.

The fact that he now had three or four bookmarks on his computer about boarding schools in New York that would take new seniors from out of state... is not the point. None of it matters if he can't tell Kurt the truth... or if Kurt likes another guy. _Fuck._

Deciding that he'd punished himself enough for his stupid thoughts, Seb digs out his phone and texts Kurt. When he sees the text that Kurt had sent before, he blushes. _What the hell has gotten into him lately?_

 _ **Me: Hey babe. Sorry bout that. I'm home now.**_

 _ **Totally Being Stalked: Np, me too. I probably needed to stop anyway, before we both got embarrassed in public.**_

 _Yeah... no shit. I'm so glad I didn't check that in front of him..._

 _ **Me: Lol You're surprisingly more shameless than I thought you'd be.**_

 _ **Totally Being Stalked: Yeah, well I'm an 18 yr old virgin. I get my thrills where I can lol**_

 _ **Me: Point. I can't imagine making it to 18.**_

 _I swear to god, if I'm still talking to him when he loses his virginity, and it's not to me, I might sink into a Bella Swan type depression. And that was some stupid shit._ Sebastian makes a mental note to get his sister a really hideous Christmas sweater for making him sit through those horrible movies before he reads Kurt's response.

 _ **Totally Being Stalked: O god. I'm afraid to ask, how old were you?**_

 _ **Me: 15 lol**_

 _ **Totally Being Stalked: So not fair! I really need to find a guy who is willing to date me before I end up doing something drastic. I really don't want to go off to New York feeling like the only virgin in the city and jump the first guy who says hi to me.**_

 _ **Me: *glare* I also disapprove of that plan.**_

 _Unless, of course, I manage to get into a NY boarding school and get the same flight out as you. That's not creepy, right? I shouldn't have to ask myself that question multiple times a day..._

 _ **Totally Being Stalked: Then man up and tell me your name, hun!**_

 _IF IT WAS THAT EASY..._

 _ **Me: D= I can't! You know I can't, we've had this talk. Many times.**_

 _ **Totally Being Stalked: Yes, but at this point I'm starting to wonder if that's really all it is.**_

 _ **Me: What the hell does that mean?**_

While he waits for Kurt to respond, Sebastian has a minor heart attack. _What the fuck? What the hell else would it mean? He_ _ **knows**_ _that I'm just worried about his reaction. And for good reason. I'm pretty sure he'd kill me. Or get one of his 50 hot jock friends to kill me. Seriously, his house is constantly being invaded by hot guys, most of which could kick my ass. Is_ _ **that**_ _what he means? That I'm literally terrified of his protectors... because he's not really wrong about that. Shit, the one time we actually hung out at a gay bar he got hit on by that big ass dude at the bar. He's a freaking magnet._

Seb is broken from his thoughts by a chime on his phone.

 _ **Totally Being Stalked: Are you sure that you just aren't telling me because you don't actually feel this way? I mean, I'll understand if you just want someone to flirt with, it's more than anyone else cares to do... I just would like to know if that's all it is so I don't get my hopes up too much.**_

 _WHAT?! How the ever loving shit did he jump to this conclusion? I've done everything but hump his virtual leg. And honestly, if he had one..._

 _ **Me: Babe... are you fucking kidding me? I thought you knew how much I want you. You're all I've thought about since your performance at sectionals... If I didn't think you would kick me in the balls, I'd sneak in your bedroom window in the middle of the night to molest you.**_

 _ **Totally Being Stalked: Again, I'm on the second floor.**_

 _Like that would stop me._

 _ **Me: Ladder. Lol For real though, if I didn't think you'd kick me out when you saw my face...**_

 _ **Totally Being Stalked: Blindfold. lol For real though, I promise not to take it off... until after.**_

 _Oh my god. He did_ _ **not**_ _just imply that he'd be open to fucking me with a blindfold on... even if he meant that as a joke, uncool._

 _ **Me: Guh. You don't fight fair. Now I have that image in my brain. At least I'm not in public anymore.**_

 _ **Totally Being Stalked: Lol Personally I'm getting rather fond of that image. So if I were to tell you my dad has one of those super sturdy industrial ladders that I could leave under my window...**_

 _Any hope of stopping this boner in progress has now left the building. What the hell happened?! Two days ago he was such an innocent guy. Now all the sudden he's decided to gift me with blue balls multiple times a day._

 _ **Me: Dear god, shut up. You are not helping a damn thing.**_

 _ **Totally Being Stalked: That all depends on the goal really. If you're looking for help being discouraged from breaking into my room, then no sir, I'm not helping. And I'm fine with that. Obviously.**_

Seb palms himself through his pants. _This can't be happening._

 _ **Me: Seriously... you're about to bite off more than you can chew here, babe.**_

 _ **Totally Being Stalked: Not so sure about that. I've got a pretty big mouth. I don't think I'd have a problem with choking.**_

The mental image that text had produced quickly shut down Sebastian's brain. He really can't be blamed. He's too busy trying not to wonder how sensitive Kurt's gag reflex is to type out a coherent sentence.

 _ **Me: . . .**_

 _ **Totally Being Stalked: *sigh* ok, I get it. I'll stop.**_

That snaps him out of it, somewhat. _Wait... what?_

 _ **Totally Being Stalked: Actually, I think I'm gonna go for a bit. I'll text you in a little while, ok?**_

 _Whoa! Wait! Does he think I'm angry or something? Shit. What a_ _ **perfect**_ _time to lose all brain cognitive function._

 _ **Me: Please don't! I'm sorry! I'm not mad! It's just uh... a different kind of problem.**_

 _ **Totally Being Stalked: Oh... really?**_

 _Oh god, the awkward. Did he really think I wouldn't get hard from him talking about that shit?_

 _ **Me: *cough* Yeah. So... What did you do today? (or, ya know, any other topic that does not involve my dick...)**_

 _ **Totally Being Stalked: Well, I bought you a Christmas present, but no, I'm perfectly happy talking about your dick. Please, continue.**_

 _HOW DID THIS GET WORSE?! What the hell is going on? A few days ago he was telling me to stop being jealous and now he's discussing my dick. I can't even._

 _ **Me: Uhhhh You did NOT just imply you're willing to sext with me...**_

 _ **Totally Being Stalked: Well, not if that's your reaction, jeez. Maybe I WOULD be better off playing xbox *glare***_

 _Shit! Not again!_

 _ **Me: NO!**_

 _ **Me: Ahh! No! I mean! Shit!**_

 _ **Me: You can't just spring shit like that on me ok?!**_

 _He's not allowed to just jump into sexting with no warning! He's never given a single sign he was okay with that until I tell him my name. If I'm supposed to talk about sex with Kurt then I have to mentally prepare myself or something. Shit. I've never really been into the whole sexting thing. Never cared enough. If I was into someone, we fucked. This is... just... new._

 _ **Totally Being Stalked: … I'm sorry. I'm just gonna go. We can talk later, just please god, never mention this again. *mortified***_

 _Fuck. What have I done now?! He can't really think I don't want to talk about sex with him... right?_

 _ **Me: no! wait!**_

 _ **Me: Not what I meant!**_

 _ **Me: Kurt!**_

 _ **Me: I know you can hear your phone beeping at you!**_

 _ **Me: theres no way in hell you just left your room, because youre either blushing or crying!**_

 _ **I**_ _might cry if he doesn't fucking answer!_

 _ **Me: I will freak the fuck out if you dont answer me!**_

 _ **Me: KURT HUMMEL I WILL CALL YOUR HOUSE AND TELL FINN THAT YOURE CRYING.**_

 _ **Totally Being Stalked: How the shit do you know my house's number?**_

 _That_ _ **ass**_ _! He was totally just sitting there reading me freak out. Why do I love this boy?_

 _ **Me: Thank fuck! Don't do that to me! Asshole!**_

 _ **Me: And how do you think? I'm your stalker! It's required for the license before they give you the complimentary binoculars.**_

 _That and you're listed. Dumbass._

 _ **Totally Being Stalked: Well, hell I didn't know there was a license. Was the test hard?**_

 _ **Me: Lol please don't make jokes about being hard. (and no, it wasn't, I just had to list three of your bath products and your favorite movie.)**_

 _Ocean Salt facial scrub, Celestial moisturizer, because he has sensitive skin, Fairly Traded Honey shampoo, because he loves the smell, and The Sound of Music. … Jesus._

 _ **Totally Being Stalked: Hey, I'm fine with talking about being hard. You're the one with the problem. Remember?**_

 _Oh god. He's talking about it again. I was kidding! … mostly._

 _ **Me: No, actually that particular problem went away with the mind numbing fear that I had just hurt you. That's REALLY not what I meant. Damn texts. You can't sense context through words on a screen.**_

 _ **Totally Being Stalked: So you were not in fact horrified and dismayed at the idea that I wanted to sext you? Because seriously... that was harsh. You had JUST said you liked me.**_

 _ **Me: I do! Jfc I was freaking out because I almost swallowed my tongue, Kurt. You've said all along that you won't do anything until I tell you who I am, then all the sudden you're talkin about my dick. I was a little fucking surprised.**_

 _And_ _ **massively**_ _turned on._

 _ **Totally Being Stalked: o... is that the only problem you have with that idea? Because you can't still be surprised... ;)**_

 _This seriously can't be happening..._

 _ **Me: Hahahaha my poor dick. It's so confused.**_

 _ **Totally Being Stalked: …?**_

 _ **Me: It keeps going up and down and doesn't know what the fuck to do anymore. I'm not sure either, to be fair.**_

 _ **Me: And NO, I have no problem sexting you. Jesus.**_

 _That would actually be the best thing to happen to me in a long damn time. He's not actually going to do this is-_

 _ **Totally Being Stalked: ok... so um... you know I've never done this, right? He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named was so vanilla I never even touched below his waist or vice versa.**_

 _Yep. Apparently so. Fuck. I really hope I don't come in 30 seconds, that'd be really embarrassing. Also, the sense of irony about that name does not escape me._ Seb can't fight the giggles that hit him at that moment.

 _ **Me: Lmao ok, rule #1: no referencing hobbits OR Harry Potter. Because... no.**_

 _ **Totally Being Stalked: duly noted.**_

 _ **Me: This is the part where I'm supposed to ask what you're wearing... but it's you and I can't wait 20 min for you to type all that out, so let's skip some steps and both strip to underwear, k? ;)**_

 _ **Totally Being Stalked: lol shut up. And um... ok. Let me lock my door.**_

As Seb gets up to take off his clothes he has to wonder why Kurt is actually agreeing to this. _Maybe he's just getting desperate for sex? If I don't make a move soon does that mean he'll just hook up with someone? He wouldn't do that... right? I really don't think I can lose him at this point... Shit. I'm so screwed._

 _ **Totally Being Stalked: Done... lol for the record, my dad is out of town for a few days. He has Christmas parties to shmooze at.**_

 _ **Me: So you're alone?**_

 _ **Totally Being Stalked: Um, I think Sam and/or Finn is here, I can hear the tv going downstairs, but they're playing xbox so they'll be at it for hours and not hear a damn thing. I've always hated those headsets, my opinion is quickly changing though.**_

 _ **Me: Ok, one more thing... my typing is about to get horrible because it's one handed... obviously... no bitching.**_

 _ **Me: I HEAR you glaring at the phone, but you know you were going to. You can also abbreviate... we're smart guys, I'm sure we can figure it out. When in doubt, assume I said cock.**_

 _ **Totally Being Stalked: LMAO again, duly noted. Also, cock is not interchangeable for EVERYTHING.**_

 _ **Me: … most things.**_

 _ **Totally Being Stalked: Lol shut up. Or actually, just change topic. So, I wear briefs, you?**_

 _ **Me: God. Boxer-briefs, but the short kind.**_

 _ **Totally Being Stalked: mm ok so now what? I'm already hard *blush***_

 _Fuck. With Kurt's pale skin I bet he blushes all over..._

 _ **Me: God, yeah. Me too. I wish I was there, so I could see you**_

 _ **Totally Being Stalked: See me? Is that all you want to do? Maybe I won't leave that ladder down there, if you're just a tease.**_

 _ **Me: Fuck. No, I wouldnt just be looking.**_

 _Would he really leave a ladder for me? God... sneaking into his room to find him blindfolded in bed..._

 _ **Totally Being Stalked: What would you do?**_

 _ **Me: Id kiss u, pushing u down on the bed, lean over u so I could press against u**_

 _ **Totally Being Stalked: God, I want to kiss u, want to feel u against me**_

 _ **Me: Id slid my hands all over u, feeling ur soft, pretty skin against me. Want to see how much u blush when ur turned on**_

 _ **Totally Being Stalked: Really? Its probably a good thing u like that I blush so much**_

 _Oh, you have no idea._

 _ **Me: Guh, I luv it. Want to trace that blush with my tongue, see how far I can make it spread. Id lick u all down ur chest, rubbing my hands over ur thighs**_

Instead of a reply, he gets a notification of a picture message. When he clicks it he groans softly. It shows all the way from the bottom half of Kurt's face, down his naked chest, to his arm, which is clearly holding his dick, even if that part of the picture is cut off, barely.

Deciding that as long as he doesn't put his face in the picture, Sebastian can respond in kind, he quickly takes a picture of his own. The picture he sends to Kurt is very similar to his, only the whole thing is shifted down by about five inches. Instead of seeing half his face, Kurt will be looking at his hand paused in the act of rubbing his dick.

 _ **Totally Being Stalked: omg!**_

 _We're sexting so... that's not a bad reaction, right?_

 _ **Me: Lol u said u didnt mind talking about my dick, out of things to say?**_

 _ **Totally Being Stalked: God, I want to taste it, ur so fucking hot**_

 _The totally unfair mental image of Kurt leaned over him on his bed, his dick sliding into his mouth makes Seb bite off a swear._

 _ **Me: Jfc want to see ur pretty lips wrapped around my cock... fuck kurt**_

 _ **Totally Being Stalked: Yes please. Please fuck kurt. Want u to fuck me so bad...**_

 _This is seriously not going to take long if Kurt keeps talking like that._

 _ **Me: Fuck, r u touching urself?**_

 _ **Totally Being Stalked: Ya, u?**_

 _ **Me: Yes... do u have lube?**_

 _The faster he comes the less embarrassed I'll be. Not to mention, Kurt laying in his bed jerking off and texting me, trying not to drop his phone... unngh._

 _ **Totally Being Stalked: Ya, I may have uh... fingered myself a few times lately, thinking abt u.**_

 _ **Me: Jesus fuck, babe. Now? Will u finger urself and pretend it's me?**_

 _ **Totally Being Stalked: Nnngh ya, hang on.**_

Sebastian lays back and tries to imagine Kurt lubing up his fingers and sliding them slowly into himself. Before long Seb has to let go of himself for a few seconds because that thought is going to end things a bit too quickly. He's just calmed down enough to reach for himself again when he hears a chime on his phone.

When he picks it up, it's another picture file. Sebastian is very grateful that he'd taken a break or this would be over. The picture turns out to be a close up of Kurt's ass with two lubed up fingers pressing deep inside himself, with his cock barely in frame, still hard, but no longer being touched.

 _ **Me: Fuuuuck o jfc I cant believe u sent that. Thank u so much, ur so fucking awesome.**_

 _ **Totally Being Stalked: Lol im just doing what u told me to ;)**_

 _ **Me: Jesus fuck, never break that habit. Always do what I tell u to. R u still only using 2 fingers?**_

 _ **Totally Being Stalked: Ya, im stretching em a lil, pretending its u, and ur getting me ready for ur cock.**_

Sebastian is pretty sure that right now, if Kurt asked him again what his name was, Seb would be babbling everything to him like a drunk sorority girl.

 _ **Me: Kurt jesus, ur fuckin killin me. Add another finger? Get urself good and ready for me.**_

 _ **Totally Being Stalked: O god! So full... want u, want ur cock in me**_

Seb is pretty sure that he should be more careful with a virgin than he's being, even with his thoughts, but all he can think about at this point is holding him down and fucking him stupid. Bending him over a desk and pounding him until Kurt comes untouched.

 _ **Me: Fuck kurt, im close**_

 _ **Totally Being Stalked: Me too, if I stop texting its good news, not bad**_

 _ **Me: Lol ur so fuckin cute, and sexy and hot and I really want to be there right now, pressing my cock into u, making u cum all over urself, clenching down on me**_

After a few long seconds of no reply, Sebastian figures Kurt had finally gotten too close and was using his texting hand to jack off. That thought pushes him even closer to the edge and Seb just lays back, thrusting up into his own hand and clenching a hand into his sheets.

When his phone suddenly rings and Seb sees 'Totally Being Stalked' pop up, he freaks out for all of two seconds before he realizes, if he answers, there's a very good chance he'll get to hear Kurt's sex noises.

He snatches the phone and hits accept before he can really think it through. As soon as it's connected he can hear the click of Kurt putting him on speaker and setting the phone down.

"D-don't worry, you don't have to say anything, I just um... my hands are too busy to text and I really want to help you get off. I want to make you come, even if I can't touch you."

Seb groans quietly, trying not to be too loud but wanting Kurt to know he's listening. "God, I can hear you. I wish you were here so I could see you... taste you. Want you to fuck me into my mattress. Want you to fuck me so hard I feel it for days... I want to kiss you and f-feel you come in me."

Hearing Kurt talk about being fucked hard and, Jesus, letting Seb come inside him, makes Sebastian clench his fist over his cock, forcing himself to wait until Kurt comes first. Hoping he doesn't give himself away, he whispers out a husky, "Fuck, Kurt... so fucking hot." Kurt moans louder than ever and Sebastian realizes that he's coming. Unable to stop himself, he grunts out, "Fuck! God! Kuurt... nnngh." as he comes over his fist, other hand grasping his phone tightly.

Sebastian just lays back, wiping his hand on his sheet and holding his phone up to his ear. He's trying to stifle his gasps as he calms down and he hears the faint sounds of Kurt moving around, probably cleaning up. Realizing it was awkward enough without him just laying there exposed, Sebastian uses his free hand to pull his underwear back up but otherwise just waits to see what Kurt will do.

Seb can't bring himself to speak but he also doesn't want to hang up. It's the first chance he's gotten to talk to Kurt in this capacity and he just... doesn't want it to end.

Eventually he hears, "Um... I don't know what to do. I don't really want to hang up but I know you won't talk..." followed by a loud sigh.

"Please just tell me who you are. I really **won't** care... Well, that's a horrible way to put it... I won't dump you just because of some stupid thing you did in the past or if you're ugly or whatever you think the reason is." Sebastian let's out a low, sad breath. _He only thinks that because he doesn't know just how bad it could be. I bet he's never once imagined it could possibly be me._

Seemingly upset that Sebastian still won't talk, Kurt bites out, "You said I've met you, well let me put it this way. If you are within two years of my age, genuinely like me, haven't lied to me in the passed week, and really are just worried about how I'm going to react, nothing else; then come get your Christmas present. You can have **me** or what I bought you at the mall today, or both. You can have whatever you want, because I'm pretty sure I'm in love with you. I don't care if you're the guy that threw me in a dumpster, or the guy that wrote 'fag' on my locker freshman year, or the guy that threatened to kill me junior year. You can be literally any guy I've ever met, as long as you fit those standards. But I'm tired of feeling like a dirty thing that has to be kept hidden, especially because you said you're already out! I'm going to text you my address and put the ladder under my window wrapped in a tarp. It's your call."

About the time he'd gotten to the 'I'm pretty sure I'm in love with you' part, Sebastian had decided enough was enough. Even if it ended in him getting his ass kicked, he was telling Kurt the truth. The rest of the message had stunned him silent before he could say so, though. Before he knows what's happened, Kurt had hung up on him and texted him his address.

Knowing that he would have turned his phone off, Sebastian makes no effort to call him back. _Besides, I owe him more than a fucking phone call. Okay. I'm doing this. I'm.. legit going to sneak into Kurt Hummel's window via ladder. I'm insane._

Sebastian flung himself out of bed and moved quickly to his shower. After taking about twice the amount of time he usually does to clean up and dress, he spends about another hour pacing his room nervously and Google mapping Kurt's house. When he's holding out printed directions and a screencap of what the actual house looks like, he starts to freak out a little.

 _Okay, so I'm really doing this? I mean... apparently he's been treated way worse than I've treated him, so I guess it could be worse. And I definitely don't want him to think I'm ashamed of him or anything. God, all I want is to lock us in his room and tell his little..._ _ **frat buddies**_ _to fuck off. I kind of want to take out an ad in the paper telling everyone in a 50 mile radius that he's taken, dammit. Especially Blaine. I'm going to have to have a talk with that asshole. It's been months and he needs to move on, right the fuck now._

Sebastian walks over to the nearest wall and smacks his forehead against it. _We're not even together yet and I'm acting like a fucking lunatic. For all I know I'm going to be climbing the ladder and he's going to look out, see who it is, and push the ladder off the window like a scared maiden. … Well, he_ _ **is**_ _a virgin._

Sadly, it's that thought that finally snaps Seb out of it. He grabs a hoodie, shoving Kurt's Christmas present in the pocket, and runs out the door, still clutching the directions in his fist.

 _Okay, sure. I might get my ass kicked tonight. I also might get to take Kurt fucking Hummel's virginity. Totally worth the fucking risk._

 _Besides, if he really has a crown, I'm totally taking it._


	4. Skype With Caution: Alternate Meeting

**So, this got caught in my head earlier today and wouldn't leave me alone lol. It's Skype With Caution again, obviously, and is AU after Chapter 2 (start of Chapter 3) def read the main story before reading this, as I didn't put near as much thought and effort into this side story as I did the original, I just wondered how it would have gone if Kurt had reacted differently to seeing Sebastian that day. =P**

* * *

Skype With Caution: Alternate Meeting

[Kurt]

Kurt stands outside the Lima Bean looking at Blaine standing in line for coffee with Sebastian and almost faints. He should have seen this coming. It pretty much had to be him didn't it? Blaine had even told him he planned to go to Dalton. So of course he'd run into Sebastian. And of course he'd hit on him. Of course. So now he had to walk in that coffee shop and tell the boy he liked that he was with the boy **he** liked.

 _How is this my life? How did I get into this mess?_

Taking probably longer than he should have, Kurt finally pulls himself together and adopts his poker face as much as he can. When he steps through the door, Kurt hears Sebastian in the flesh for the first time.

"Your whole bashful schoolboy thing, it's super hot."

Kurt almost swallows his tongue. He can't do this. He can't. He can't walk over there and deal with this. It's not until he hears Sebastian say "It doesn't bother me, if it doesn't bother you." that Kurt snaps out of it. Seeing red, Kurt walks over.

Glaring at Sebastian, Kurt sits down next to Blaine and turns to the smaller boy. "Oh, don't worry, hun. You don't need to lie to chase him off. All you have to do to get rid of a guy like this is explain that you have standards and aren't going to give him what he wants."

There's a few seconds of silence while Blaine sputters and Sebastian gives him a calculating look before the taller boy crosses his arms over his chest. As he goes to speak though, he's cut off by Blaine finally managing words.

"Oh my god, Kurt! This is so not what we agreed to! I said I needed you to help, not to piss him off."

Kurt shrugs and looks back at the boy he'd **thought** he'd come to know online. _If this is the way he is in real life, I have no interest in preserving his feelings. Not after the way I've been treated for the past week._

"I don't really care if he gets pissed off, I'm not staying. I just wanted to point out that you don't have to worry about chasing him off. Show serious interest in him, and he'll run away on his own. Now, if you'll excuse me, I really need to be **anywhere** else."

As Kurt gets up to walk away, he's stopped by Sebastian's cold voice. "Listen **Princess** , I don't know what your problem is-"

Kurt cuts him off, all but snarling, "Don't call me 'Princess'."

His only response is a huge, mean smirk.

Ignoring Sebastian, Blaine points out, "You let Puck call you 'princess' all the time, Kurt. What the hell is going on?"

Kurt glares at the taller boy before finally turning to his friend and huffing out, "This is 'Bas' and he doesn't know. I should have realized when you said you met a guy the same day you went to Dalton, but it didn't click for some reason."

Blaine looks at Sebastian with wide eyes, quickly getting out of his chair and turning back to Kurt. "I swear I had no idea, Kurt! I'd have told him to back off if I knew." Realizing what he was saying, Blaine turns to the taller boy, suddenly outraged. "You were hitting on me when you had a boyfriend?! It's bad enough that you were trying to get me to cheat on my fake one, but seriously?! What the hell is wrong with you?"

Kurt pales as Sebastian finally drops the smirk, totally confused. "What? I don't have a boyfriend." He turns to Kurt. "And don't call me Bas, I don't know you."

Snorting, Kurt goes to leave. "Finally, something we can agree on. I obviously didn't know you either."

He barely makes it two steps before Blaine is pulling him back over to the table, hissing quietly, "Wait wait wait. Now **I'm** confused. This is 'Bas' right? **The** Bas?"

Kurt huffs, sitting back in the chair. Clearly he's going to have to explain everything before he can manage to get home and block this asshole off his Skype. "Yes, hun. This is Bas, but he doesn't know who **I** am. And he's right, we aren't dating." Kurt mumbles, "Hell, we're barely speaking at the moment."

Noticing Seb's honest confusion, Blaine sits back down and pokes Kurt in the side. "How do you know it's him but he doesn't know it's you?"

Kurt leans back in his chair and picks a spot on the table to stare at, not wanting to witness Sebastian's reaction. "He uses a webcam, whereas I only use a mic. He thinks I live in Kentucky, when obviously, I knew he'd be going to Dalton before he even moved here. His sister told me they were moving to Columbus and I was too afraid to tell him the truth about living here. I'm kind of surprised he hasn't noticed the similarities between Dalton and the school I talked about, actually."

Still refusing to look up, Kurt has no idea how Sebastian is reacting, so he just waits. Blaine coughs nervously before muttering,

"Okay, well... I'm going to go. Clearly you guys have things to talk about. I'm going to text Puck and tell him that he got screwed out of going with you to meet him, so be prepared for that mess when you get home."

Kurt scoffs but looks up at the smaller boy. "He'll get over it. I hardly planned this. Technically, this is **your** fault. If you'd been able to control yourself, I wouldn't have needed to play the overprotective, jackass boyfriend."

Blaine shrugs unapologetically. "Well, sure. But then how long would it have been until you met and told him the truth? I'm **helping**."

Kurt scoffs again. "If you want to help, you'll hold off on that text for at least 20 minutes and not tell Noah where we are when you **do** text him. The last thing I need is him showing up here to pull the 'big brother' routine. I can handle this."

With a small wave and a sympathetic look, Blaine leaves Kurt alone with the boy he'd been both wanting and dreading to meet. Still refusing to look up at him, Kurt sighs.

"Okay, you've got about five minutes before I bail on this. I can only take so much awkward silence."

With a carefully blank voice, Sebastian asks, "So... you're Eli... right?" After Kurt's nod, Sebastian shifts slightly. "And uh, 'Puck' is Noah?"

Kurt sighs, looking up at Sebastian for the first time since he'd decided to admit who he was. "Yes. He's a friend of my brother's. They're on the football team together, and we're all in New Directions, which is why we're all so close. For the record, Blaine is the Tom Jones-piano-burner."

Sebastian's pokerface wavers slightly before he asks, "So... does Blaine just not know about Halloween, or what?"

Kurt blinks in confusion. "Well, he wasn't at the party, if that's what you mean? But I told him about it, so..."

Seb grinds his teeth a bit. "I meant, why did he assume you were my boyfriend? If you told him about Halloween and he knows Noah, wouldn't he know **you guys** are dating?"

Kurt snorts out a laugh. " **What**? I'm not dating Noah. Why the hell would you think that?"

Sebastian shrugs, still trying to play it off like he doesn't care, but looking more confused now. "Well, after you guys finally hooked up, I figured it was a no-brainer that you'd end up with him."

Laughing outright, Kurt throws his hand up. "Oh my god. No. I never hooked up with Noah, Jesus." Suddenly remembering they're in a very public place, Kurt stands up and says, "Uh, look... can we talk about this outside or something? I really don't want to talk about this surrounded by people."

Deciding to just walk out and hope he's followed, Kurt heads out to his nav to throw his bag inside before he leans against it. Inspecting the sleeve of his shirt so he won't have to look up at Sebastian, Kurt finally continues,

"I don't know what you think happened on Halloween, but you're obviously wrong. I got really drunk and Noah- sorry, Puck. You should call him Puck. Anyway, he took my laptop away so I couldn't do anything stupid. It was the first time I'd had a drink since sophomore year so I was hungover and throwing a bit of a pity party the next day. By the time I signed on, you didn't. I figured I'd done something to chase you off, so I tried to apologize when you showed back up, but you started ignoring me and acting weird. Today, Blaine asked for my help pretending to be his boyfriend, since everyone keeps assuming we're dating anyway, and I heard you. I couldn't take it anymore. I've spent months hiding the fact that I lived so close because I knew you wouldn't want to meet the real me and then I turn around and there you are... shoving your 'manwhoring' as you so delicately put it, in my face. So I snapped. I'm sorry."

Kurt finally stops his diarrhea of the mouth and he bites his lips, hoping that will stop him from filling the silence. _Better to be awkward and quiet than to start spilling my feelings again._

When he realizes he's all but pulled the seam out of his shirt sleeve he crosses his arms on his chest and looks back up at Sebastian, officially done. Before he can make an excuse and leave though, he's stopped by the look on Seb's face.

Sebastian looks like he's been hit over the head with a baseball bat. Kurt doesn't honestly think he could look more surprised if he suddenly sprouted wings. Cocking an eyebrow at him, Kurt shifts on his feet a little.

"What?"

The taller boy startles before finally composing his face into an actual human expression, not just dumbfounded shock. He coughs and asks, "So, um... if you aren't with Puck... why didn't you want to meet me? I mean... you knew I was here, you used to go to Dalton, I've heard all about you from the Warblers. They think you're dating Blaine, by the way."

Kurt scoffs. "Oh, I'm aware. Last year, right before I met you, we almost did date and everyone got the wrong impression."

Sebastian leans closer slightly before asking quietly, "Why didn't you?"

"He um... didn't like me back when I had a crush on him. And I was really upset by that for awhile... until I met this guy on the internet. Then I kinda forgot he existed outside of friendship, actually."

Smirking now, Seb puts his hands in his pockets and turns to face him properly. "Is this your way of telling me that you **do** actually have an online boyfriend and just never told me?"

Kurt blushes and huffs, holding his arms tighter across his chest. "Shut up, Bas. The last thing you need is your ego fed."

Sebastian grins at him. "I can't fucking believe you live here. This is insane. Why didn't you **tell me**?"

Shrugging, Kurt bites his lips again. "I wanted to... but I was sorta terrified of the idea of seeing you face to face. And it kinda seemed like you wouldn't have cared. You've never really shown any interest in meeting up. I mean... even the day I found out you were moving here you weren't paying attention to me, not until you caught me singing. I just... you didn't ask me anything, you didn't tell me you were moving here until you were already packed up..."

Seb scoffs, shoving his hands deeper in his pockets. " **You** were the one that was so anal about keeping everything anonymous, babe. You even told me right away that you gave me a fake name. And you still have to explain that at some point, Em's been driving me nuts about it. I thought if I mentioned meeting up you'd block me or something."

Kurt shrugs again and looks down at his feet. "I just didn't want either of us to be... disappointed. I know you thought I was hot and just... self conscious or something, but obviously that's not true. Frankly I've had one too many crushes that ended in heartbreak. It's bad enough when the guy is straight and **can't** like me back, but I couldn't handle falling for another gay guy just to have him turn me down. Not knowing for sure was easier."

Sebastian frowns. "Okay... so what you're saying is that you think you're, what? Not hot enough for me? Or that I'd be disappointed in you somehow? I don't understand this at all. You told me you weren't dating Puck, and then all of the sudden he started hanging around more... I assumed that was either because you were dating, or at the very least you wanted me to back off on the flirting. Now you're telling me that you've... liked me this whole time? You really need to clear this shit up, because clearly I'm not catching on."

Huffing, Kurt squeezes his eyes shut and stomps his foot. "I'm going to kill Noah for this." Turning back to Seb, the smaller boy clenches his arms closer to his body and says, "Look... I may have um... implied to Noah that I liked you... So he decided the best way to get a reaction out of you was to give you 'competition'. He's been flirting with me while I was on Skype to piss you off."

"Well, it worked. Too well. I thought you guys were fucking with me, that he was rubbing it in my face that you guys were together."

Kurt gapes at him. "No! Oh my god. I would never let him do that. Don't get me wrong, that may very well have been what he was trying to do, but I'd never have let him act like that if I thought you actually liked me. I thought he was wasting his time because you didn't care. You flirt all the time but you never cross lines and you always pull back, so I just assumed you're naturally flirty."

Seb throws his arms up. "You're fucking kidding me. Babe, I've liked you ever since I got on Skype and you didn't change how you spoke to me. Most people either hate me because they're jealous or suck up to me because they wanted me to fuck them. You still treated me like a cocky asshole and I **love** that about you. I love that I can say and do whatever I want and it doesn't change your opinion of me because I'm not on a pedestal or anything. You call me out on my bullshit, listen to me bitch about stupid stuff, and help me with my sister. There's a thousand reasons I like you... the fact that you **are** hot as fuck and apparently just 'self conscious' is just a bonus."

Kurt blushes again and looks back down. "So... you're not disappointed? Really?"

Obviously done with talking, Sebastian groans in annoyance before attacking Kurt. The next second, Kurt is pressed even closer to his Navigator and his lips are being assaulted. Catching on quickly, Kurt grabs him by the back of the neck and pulls him down into the kiss. When he pulls back for breath, he's pressed so tightly to his truck that he almost pushes Sebastian over trying to detach himself.

Kurt giggles for a few seconds before leaning up to kiss him again, this time much more chastely. Suddenly realizing what he's doing, Kurt looks around the parking lot nervously. "Um... as much as I hate to say this... this is hardly the time or place to have this uh... discussion."

Seb coughs and steps back, trying to be subtle about putting some space between them, before saying, "Okay, but I'm far from finished uh... talking to you. I'd really like to discuss what it is we're going to do from here on out."

Smiling, Kurt leans back again, looking the taller boy up and down. "Well, you need to get back to school... they really frown on boarders going missing during the week." Biting his lip again, Kurt debates for a second before asking, "Do you think you'd be able to sneak me in and not get us caught?"

With a smirk, Sebastian leans in to kiss him again, muttering, "That shouldn't be a problem. I have a roommate, but he'll be out late. He had a date tonight. Besides, he'll just be amazed that I have a boyfriend now, I gave him quite a lot of shit for being monogamous at the beginning of the year."

Kurt almost fist pumps for getting Sebastian to be the one to use the word 'boyfriend' first. _I really need to stop hanging around jocks... they're changing me._

Instead, Kurt just smiles at him and says, "Okay, give me a minute. I have to make a few phone calls."

Ten minutes later he's shoving the phone back in his pocket. He'd called Blaine first, to find out who all he'd told and to make sure he'd help cover if needed. Then Puck, to tell him he was fine and where he'd be. The last call had been to his dad, who he'd told that he wouldn't be home tonight, that he was spending the night with Blaine, who'd just been stood up for a coffee date, where the guy left with someone else, and he needed a friend. Since the crush had long since been dead, Burt agreed under the stipulation that Kurt swore nothing would happen between him and Blaine that night. Kurt had, of course, had no problem making or keeping that promise.

His surprise at being trusted so much was short lived since first thing the next morning, Jeff Sterling posted a picture of him -asleep on top of Sebastian- to Facebook.

Obviously some things are just meant to happen.


	5. Fight For Your Right: Round Two Fight

**So, this one is a long time coming, sorry if it disappoints those that waited for so long D=**

* * *

Fight For Your Right: Round Two... Fight!

[Puck]

When Kurt pulls him down onto the couch, Puck is just relieved not to see Burt's shotgun in the room. Finn looks like he can't decide if he wants to stay and find out what's going on or run away and pretend none of this is happening. Burt makes the decision for him when he glares at the taller boy until he sits uneasily in one of the armchairs.

Kurt speaks up first, saying, "I'm sorry we didn't tell you sooner. Like I said, Noah's just not out yet, and we're worried about how his mom will handle the news that he's not exactly straight."

Puck chuckles. "Honestly, she'll probably be more upset that you're not Jewish."

Shrugging, Kurt turns to face him a bit more. "True, I'm not. But I'm also not anything else. So it's not like I'll pop out babies and insist they be raised Christian or something."

"Great, we'll lead with that. We'll remind her that this time, if there's a baby involved, it's totally intentional and that I have first dibs on what religion it's raised as. That should go really well, babe." Puck snorts.

Burt growls out, "Could we table all talks of babies until you guys explain what the hell is going on here?"

Rolling his eyes, Kurt replies, "I thought that was fairly obvious. Noah and I are dating."

Glaring at his son, Burt bites out, "Yeah, surprisingly I got that, what with him being in your bed and all. At least I'd hope you're dating to have made it that far."

Puck winces mentally. _Well, technically we_ _ **were**_ _dating before I made it to his room._

Kurt seems unbothered. "We've been dating for four months, since the beginning of November."

Finn reminds them that he's in the room by yelping, "What?! **No**. There's no way you guys could have been together that long and we didn't notice. You're barely even friends. You don't acknowledge each other at all unless the whole glee club is together!"

"Well, who's fault is **that**?" At Puck's growl, both Burt and Finn look confused. "If it wasn't for Dudley Do-Right over there, we could at least hang out here."

Burt snaps, "It seems like you're managing just fine."

Waving his hands to calm everyone down, Kurt huffs out, "Jesus, shut up guys, you're not helping. And stop with the protective bear routine, Dad. I'll be 18 in two months, stop acting like I'm an innocent maiden daughter with a freshly tarnished reputation. We've been dating for awhile, and honestly, we've been messing around for even longer. I'm pretty sure you got enough of a visual this morning that I don't need to point out that he's not exactly taking advantage of a delicate flower."

Finn flinches visibly, and Burt doesn't fair much better at the reminder. Eventually the older man gets his voice back and points to both his son and Puck. "Dating or not, I never said you could bring your boyfriend over to our house and sleep with him. It's totally inappropriate. You're still just kids!"

Kurt narrows his eyes at his dad. "When you caught me making out with Brittany - **last year** \- you told me to have fun and respect her afterward. You even said to use protection if it got serious!"

Burt flounders for a second before saying, "I didn't think you'd get that far! Like I told you, I've always known you were gay. I still don't know what you were doing with that girl, or why, but I knew you wouldn't actually have sex with her."

Puck wants to point out that it's still pretty stupid to give your teenage son permission to have sex with someone, even if you don't think they'll do it. Luckily, Kurt steamrolls over any chance he'd have had to speak.

"So you were willing to play 'straight chicken' with some random girl that I could have potentially gotten pregnant or something but I'm not allowed to sleep with my **boyfriend** who I **love**? How the hell is that fair? And for that matter, how was I supposed to know that 'permission' was fake and conditional? You never told me not to bring boys home."

Snorting, Puck mumbles, "Actually, the first time we did anything, Burt's the one that told Finn to ask me to stay the night."

Finn all but shrieks, pointing at Puck. "NO! That was last summer, there's no way you guys have been together that long. Kurt told me during the duet thing that you guys weren't even friends!"

"We **weren't** , not really. But we had messed around by that point... It just happened. If you had left us the hell alone, we'd have started dating that week. I was working up the nerve to ask him out but you kept acting like a jerk and spreading around all that B.S. about last year. After that, Kurt avoided me because he believed your crap and I thought he didn't like me, so I backed off." Puck looks like he's going to pop up off the couch and hit his supposed best friend until Kurt takes his hand in his and rubs one of his thumbs on the back of it.

"Calm down, sweetie. It's fine. We worked it out eventually." When Puck relaxes a little, Kurt looks back to find his dad watching him with a carefully blank face and Finn looking confused again. Huffing, he says, "Look... I was stupid. Noah is used to being treated a certain way by people that he likes and I accidentally made the same mistake. It took you awhile to sit down and actually talk about what we were doing and why. None of the details matter, and frankly aren't your business. All you need to know is that we love each other, and any attempts to protect my virtue are moot at this point. He's been sleeping here for months, we just usually manage to sneak him out in the morning."

Puck laughs. "I guess we're getting lax in our old age." Kurt huffs but leans back against his shoulder, still clutching his hand.

Burt snaps his eyes up from their joined hands and growls out, "Yeah, speaking of that... about your 'lost virtue'... you said you were messing around before you guys dated, and now you're sleeping with him only a couple of months into the relationship... So, explain to me why it is I shouldn't be worried about this?"

Kurt glares, his grip tightening on Puck's hand. "I'm not explaining the details of my sex life to my dad and my step brother. I **absolutely** refuse. All you need to know is that it happened kind of by accident at first and it eventually led to us dating. I was already in love with him before we actually slept together, even though I hadn't realized it or told him about it yet."

Finn starts to speak but is cut off by Puck pointing at him with the hand not captured by Kurt. "You don't get to have an opinion, Finn. You've done everything from cheat on your girlfriends to lose your virginity to someone you didn't even **like** , let alone love."

Finn points back, making Kurt roll his eyes. "You're one to talk! Do you even **remember** who you lost your virginity with?!"

Kurt grabs the hand Puck is still pointing with and pulls it together with the other one, holding them both. He glares at his brother and bites out, "Shut up, Finn. I get that you're uncomfortable with the gay thing, but enough already. We're together. We've been together. We're staying together. Get over it." Turning back to Burt, Kurt sighs and continues, "I know that you worry about me, and you do your best to support me, but you still hold a lot more biases than you think you do. The fact that you accused me of taking advantage of Sam for the duet competition, just because I'd had a crush on Finn once, proves that."

Puck turns to Kurt, shouting, "What?! He actually took **his** side on the whole singing thing? It was just a **song**! No one but Finn ever mentioned it to me! It's glee club, no one cares!" Feeling Kurt clench his hands tighter around his own he tries to calm down a little before turning to Finn.

"In case you forgot, I was there for most of Kurt's **inappropriate behavior** toward you. Was he obvious, yes. Did it make you uncomfortable, I'm sure it did. But you never told him to back off. You never told him you were straight. To someone with a crush you probably just looked worried you'd be outed or something. Then you go around making Kurt sound like a rapist or something. The worst thing he did to you wasn't half as embarrassing as when Sam -ya know, Kurt's latest **victim** \- kissed him on the cheek in the lunchroom. Clearly Sam felt **very** 'threatened' by the gay kid."

Kurt snorts. "Actually, he told me the day after he kissed me in the lunchroom that he was kind of hurt that I'd rejected him his first week in glee. It was the main reason he put up with Quinn even when she was being kinda bitchy to him; he didn't think anyone besides Finn liked him." Seeing Burt's eye twitching, Kurt scoffs at him. "Oh my god, Dad. Sam is straight, and obviously not a threat to my nonexistent virginity. He was just defending me from a homophobe. Besides, I think he just likes having someone else to blame for him ever dating Quinn."

Puck shrugs. "He has a point. Wish I had an excuse."

Finn mutters, "Me too." and slumps down into the couch.

Giggling at their stupidity, Kurt pats Puck's hands again. "It's okay, sweetie. I promise to cut off her high pony if she so much as looks at you again."

Burt clears his throat and leans forward, resting his forearms on his knees. "The point I'm trying to make here is that I wouldn't let you, or Finn, or anyone else your age stay here with a significant other for the night. It's just not right for kids your age to already be that progressed. You need time away from each other and privacy. You'll either get too attached, too close, and end up too serious, too fast, or you'll get burnt out on each other."

Kurt sighs again. "In most cases, that's probably true. If Finn would've slept in the same room with Rachel or Quinn, I'm sure that would have ended horribly... but that's mainly because they were always together. They spent all day at school together, usually spent their afternoons together, and then to have the nights together too, would have been ridiculous. But Puck and I can't be together in school or even in public after school until we turn 18. Right now, all we have are the nights he manages to sneak in here. And believe it or not, those nights don't always lead to sex."

Puck smirks and mutters 'I wish' to Kurt, earning himself an elbow to the ribs and matching glares from Burt and Finn.

Kurt hisses, "Who's not helping?" before turning back to his dad. "If you don't want him to sleep here, fine. But you have to let him come over after school and on weekends. And before you start with the whole 'open doors, no touching below the waist' thing, just know that it's pointless. We're teenagers, and we've already done it. It's a bell you can't really un-ring. The question is how much of it you want to hear and/or witness. We're almost 18, as long as we're responsible and don't traumatize you, we should be treated like adults. Especially here, since we can't be together out **there**."

Burt takes a long time thinking it over, but eventually caves. He agrees that Puck can come over as long as they aren't in school and he leaves by Kurt's curfew, since they can't really go **out**. Finn seems mildly put out, probably because he's, once again, in between girlfriends. Kurt and Puck have a bet on which girl he'll crawl back to first, Quinn or Rachel.

Kurt wins that bet less than a week later while Puck just shakes his head. _I guess Quinn is just a lesson everyone has to learn at their own speed. Too bad Finn's always been a little slow on the uptake._

Puck is laying back on his bed, staring at the ceiling when he gets a new text.

 _ **From Honey Nut Cheerio:**_ _So... how long do you think we should wait til we try sneaking you back in at night?_


	6. Baby Daddy: Mother's Day

**When I realized that 'Puck' being 14 meant he was born 'this year' I decided to write this. I didn't plan it very well, so excuse any inconsistencies.**

* * *

Baby Daddy: Mother's Day

[Sebastian]

When Kurt walks back into the room, hanging up the phone, Sebastian frowns at him before turning back to their daughter who was still dressed from going to the park earlier.

Sophie was just over 14 months and was absolutely perfect. It's kind of hard for Seb to even remember a time when he'd thought he didn't want children. _God, imagine when she's all grown up? Just picturing her dating makes me want to break out in hives. I wonder if I could get away with locking her in a tower like Rapunzel? She_ _ **loves**_ _Tangled._

Sebastian glances over at Kurt again to find him standing by the window, glaring down at the street, arms crossed over his chest. After making sure that Sophie is distracted enough by her shoe to not cause trouble, Seb stands and walks over to his boyfriend. Stepping up behind him, he wraps his arms around Kurt's middle, under his elbows, and puts his chin on his shoulder.

"If it upsets you that much, we don't have to do anything for Mother's Day, but I still think you're being ridiculous. Just because you aren't a woman-"

Kurt huffs, elbowing the taller boy. "That's not my problem. If you guys want to slot me into the 'mother' role, I don't really care. I just hate the stupid holiday."

Blinking at him, Sebastian asks, "Why? You love Father's Day. You 'helped' Sophie make me that card and lumpy clay thing last year, even tho all she really did was try to eat various bits, and you spend hours on Skype with Burt every year..."

Rolling his eyes, Kurt steps out of Sebastian's hold and turns to him, arching an eyebrow. "Exactly. I love holidays. I love going overboard and being stupidly excited about people or things on a certain day... but every year, I'm reminded that I don't have a mother to gush all over or spend time with."

Noticing the uncomfortable look on Seb's face Kurt reaches up to flip his slightly too-long hair out of his eyes. "Do you remember elementary school? In like third or fourth grade, near the end of the year? What did you guys do?"

Only thinking about it for a few seconds, Sebastian winces. "We made cards and gifts for Mother's Day." When all Kurt does is stare at him blankly, Seb points out, "Yeah, but they had to have known about your mom, right?"

Kurt scoffs. "Sure. Some teachers let me sit at the back of the room, or off to the side and read. Others made me participate and told me to give it to whoever 'was like a mother to me'. Those gifts went in the trash, right there in the classroom. I wasn't about to remind my father of something he was already hurting over."

Seeing how tense Kurt is, Sebastian reaches for his hand and pulls him toward the couch, pulling him snug against his side. "Okay, I get that this holiday is going to have some emotional minefields for you, but have you thought about what it's going to be like for Sophie? She'll not only have no mother, but two fathers. And by Father's Day, she'll be out of school, so she's on her own. I can come up with at least ten reasons why you should take this holiday and run with it, the main one being I'm **terrible** at crafts. At least she'll get to make your stuff in school with supervision."

Kurt huffs and leans against Seb more. "It's fine, you're right. I just... it's going to take awhile before I can get used to this. I mean, I called Noah to make sure he'd take the flowers I ordered to my mom's grave, since I can't be there this year... but it kind of feels like I'm letting her down."

Sebastian tries to keep the complete confusion off his face. "Uh, babe... I really doubt she'd think you're letting her down by staying in New York to raise her granddaughter instead of running back to Ohio to put some flowers down for her."

When Kurt sniffs quietly, Seb leans down to look, and finds the smaller man crying. Panicking slightly, he rubs his hand up and down Kurt's arm and continues, "Besides, think about how excited she'd be that you're starting back at NYADA this fall."

His intention of distracting Kurt works a little too well when the pale boy immediately surges up off the couch and grabs his phone. "Oh god. I forgot to call NYADA. I can't put that off, what if they don't let someone in because I forgot to tell them?"

When the smaller man darts out of the room before Sebastian can say another word, he turns to look at their daughter, who is still trying to figure out how to take her shoe off and asks, "What the hell was that about?"

Her gurgling laugh is his only response.

* * *

Later that night, as Sebastian is studying, he sees Kurt chewing his lip on the couch. Figuring that Sophie was asleep now and it was safe to talk to him again, Sebastian closes his book and sits next to Kurt.

It takes the thin boy a minute to realize he's there, and when he does, he jumps a little. "Shit, Bas. You scared me."

Cocking his eyebrow, Seb reaches forward to rub a hand over Kurt's knee. "Sorry, babe. I just noticed that you've seemed... off all day. What's up?"

Kurt sighs heavily and then turns to Sebastian. "I um... wasn't going to tell you until after your last final... but since apparently I'm turning into a crazy person... I'm um... pregnant. Again."

Seb stares at him for a few seconds before leaping forward to hug him. "Oh my god! What? How long have you known? Are you sure? How far along are you? Have you seen a doctor? What-"

Suddenly stopped by Kurt putting his hand over his mouth, Sebastian stops talking and tries to remember to breathe. _We're going to have another baby! I'll actually get to be there for it this time! Holy shit, no wonder he's been acting weird._

Kurt smiles at him and takes his hand away. "I've been wondering for a couple weeks now. I wasn't sure until today, when I took a home test. I think I'm only around six or seven weeks, but I won't know for sure until I see the doctor, and I made an appointment for next week. Again, I wanted you to get through your finals first, and I knew you'd want to come with me."

Sebastian takes a few minutes to process all of that before he swears quietly to himself. "Dammit, babe. You blew my surprise out of the water. I was waiting to tell you that I'm graduating early." When Kurt goes to speak, Seb covers his mouth, smirking, before continuing. "Between all my AP courses in high school and the extra classes I've been taking over the summers, I managed to finish a full year ahead of time. I was going to tell you on Friday, after my final. I had a big dinner planned, and now you've totally screwed it up."

Before Kurt can say anything else, Seb darts into their bedroom and comes out with the ring he'd hidden weeks ago. Sitting back on the couch, he opens the box and hands it to Kurt. "I was going to propose after dinner. We can get married whenever you want, I don't care if it's tomorrow at the courthouse or next year with everyone you've ever met there. It's your wedding, I'm just the guy that gets to keep you."

Kurt starts tearing up again and Sebastian isn't sure if it's the emotions or the hormones, but either way, he takes the small white gold ring out of the box and holds it up to Kurt in question. Smiling through his watery eyes, Kurt holds his hand out, and Seb slides the ring on.

After Kurt takes a minute to just stare at the ring on his finger he turns to kiss Sebastian. As he leans back, wiping his eyes, Kurt says, "I'm fine with waiting until next year. By then we'll be able to have both of our children in the wedding pictures and Sophie should be able to handle being the flower girl without an escort. It's just... what are we gonna do? We can't have two babies here, Seb."

Snorting, Sebastian looks around. "Shit, you're right. It was huge for just me, or even just the two of us, but it's not really equipped to handle two kids." Seb's penthouse had been technically a one bedroom, but it had come with an office. Once they'd cleared it out, there was enough room for a small nursery, and considering how big the rest of the apartment was, it had worked fine... but with another baby, there was just no way.

Kurt shifts uncomfortably before admitting, "Um... I've been thinking... I'm not going back to NYADA." At the shock on Seb's face, Kurt points out, "I'm pregnant again... It's not an easy thing for a dancer to bounce back from, sweetie. And frankly, I don't want to have a profession where I can't be at home with my kids if they get sick or something. If I were to graduate NYADA and go on to act on Broadway, I wouldn't be able to stay with them when I have shows. There are very, **very** few sick days in that business, and I just don't want to miss that much of my babies' lives."

Sebastian starts to point out that he can't really picture Kurt being a stay at home mom, but actually... he can. At least for the first few years, he could totally see Kurt staying home with their children and playing the doting house-husband. He'd taken care of himself and Burt for years before Carole came in to relieve him. He still calls his dad once a week to make sure he's listening to her and taking his meds. It's far too easy to picture when he thinks about it. Instead of saying any of that though, Seb grabs his left hand and twists the ring around his finger before asking,

"Okay, so what **do** you want?"

Kurt bites his lip and looks down at their hands. "It's selfish... I can't ask you to-"

Squeezing his hand, Sebastian cuts him off. "You're carrying my baby, you're allowed to be selfish. Just tell me."

Looking back up at him, Kurt admits, "I... want to go home." Continuing before Sebastian can say anything, Kurt admits, "Look, I love New York. I always have, and I always will. But when I think of New York I think of this bright future on the stage, and all these big important things I used to want. When I think of **home** , I think of my dad, and my daughter, and as stupid as it sounds, Finn, Noah, and the rest of the New Directions. I think of my dad's garage, and meeting up with you and Blaine in Columbus to go shopping. I want to move back to Ohio... not Lima, because I would never want our children raised in that much of a backwards town... but one of the bigger cities..."

Kurt trails off, and when Sebastian still hasn't said anything after almost a full minute, he says, "I know that you want to go to law school, which is why I said it's selfish. I can't make you choose between me and school. Just because I want to give up my old dreams doesn't mean I want you to. In fact, if you do, we're pretty well screwed. I can't exactly be a kept man if you don't have a good job to support me with."

Sebastian mentally pats himself on the back for keeping a straight face before he quickly stands and goes to get his laptop. He comes back to the couch and turns toward the coffee table, quickly looking something up. Within minutes he turns the screen to Kurt. "Well, good news. The best law school in Ohio is in Columbus, so we won't have to live somewhere we know nothing about. And we know that worse comes to worse, they have great private schools there. Now, Columbus is about two hours away from Lima, so it's still a bit of a pain in the ass for Burt to visit, but he flies around enough that he's there fairly often anyway. We can just find a cute little three bedroom house to hold us over until I'm out of school. It'll probably cost less to buy a house in Ohio than to rent a penthouse in Manhattan for the next three years, anyway."

It takes Kurt a few attempts before he regains the power of speech. Once he does, he's not only shrieking and hugging Sebastian, he's crying again.

 _Oh, shit. He's going to be_ _ **such**_ _a pain in the ass for the next eight months._


End file.
